One Last Chance: A Nymphadora Tonks and Remus Lupin Love Story

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Remus sat in the corner of the Leaky Cauldron, drinking and sulking. He contemplated what Harry had said, turning it over in his mind.

He'd begun to regret everything he'd told them. Sure, accompanying them on their mission would've take his mind off of things and killed him in the process, but was it really what was best for his wife and child?

He couldn't stop thinking about what would've happened if she hadn't married him. How upset and easily destroyed he would've been. How he would never be able to look at her with a sinking feeling in his chest, telling the same exact lie to himself over and over. This was meant to be. It's for her safety and happiness, not your happiness.

All those months he'd left, never seeing any members of the Order, were painful and heartbreaking. He'd hoped that she'd fallen for another and would be happier than if she was with him. But she wouldn't leave his mind.

Now, it's all changed. Was he doing the right thing? Leaving them in the heat of this war? Remus tried to convince himself he was doing the noble thing. Staying away. Maybe they'd forget about him and she's be safe from the Ministry and other witches and wizards. But he knew deep in his heart that it wasn't the right or honorable thing to do.

Oh, what would his friends have done in this situation? Sirius thought he was the most obvious choice and gave up the job of being secret keeper in hopes that James and Lily would be safe. Of course, they had thought that he was the traitor, not Pettigrew, but there was wisdom in their actions. James had stuck by Lily's side all throughout her pregnancy and Harry's birth. They both agreed to die for their son, in the hopes he'd have a better life. And what remarkable thing did I do, he mused, I left the most wonderful person in the world and our unborn child in fear and worry.

His fears weren't completely hysterical, though. But purely based on the fact that the child was a werewolf and that he'd cursed both his wife and child to a life of fear and unhappiness. Remus never stopped to consider the fact that the child might not be a werewolf.

And so he sulked, unable to be moved. He wanted to leave this place and beg Dora's forgiveness. But she wouldn't forget and forgive what he did. It had been too long. They've never argued like that before. But he loved her. That could never possibly be enough, could it?

Love was such a fragile thing, so difficult to find and a easy thing to fall out of. But he'd found it. After years of suffering and hating himself for what he was. That all changed when he met her. She'd brought so much color and light into his life. As he ran, he watched all that color seem to fade away.

He needed to go back. But how? How could she ever forgive him for all the spiteful and bitter things he'd said? He learned a long time ago, from when James and Lily were dating, it was never girl's fault and you should always apologize first. He didn't ever think he'd need that smidge of information, but it finally came into play.

He brush a picked of tan hair out of his eyes. He took on one last sips from his cup of firewhiskey. Then stood to hurry home. He hung his head low and flipped the collars up to cover part of his face so to not be noticed. Times were dangerous and the wizarding world wasn't safe. Remus reached a safe looking corner and raised his wand to apparate back home. He had one goal in mind—to beg his wife's forgiveness and hope for the best.

~oOo~

The ashes of the notes sat on the table, yet to be cleaned. She brushed them into the palm of her hand and spread them into a potted plant. She didn't know what plant it was, but read somewhere that ashes were good to put in a garden. A potted plant should be the same.

She'd decided to sit down and just finish another book or so. But her mind drifted elsewhere. Back to her troublemaking years at Hogwarts. Pranking her dorm mates, teachers, and fellow students. Laughing and having a butterbeer with her friends. Her friends helping prank Flich a few times, (just a few). A smile crossed her face as quickly as it flitted away.

Every story had a happy ending. When would she have her happy ending? Life wasn't fairytale, she told herself, sighing. But happiness is a simple and close concept. Something everyone had in their lives. At least once.

Everything became so bright and beautiful, but was it really meant to last? Had they rushed into a relationship? This was the first time she'd doubted loving him. Which she never did before. They'd been friends for two years. Sirius and Dumbledore's deaths had only brought them closer. Should they have gotten to know each other better?

No, she told herself, this-this was meant to be, wasn't it? They'd known each other for three years now, but felt as if they'd known the other one for a lifetime. They'd worked so well together, getting along perfectly. Even though, at first glance, their personalities were the complete opposite. His true care and affection brought happiness in her life, something she hadn't received from the ones who'd asked her out. He wasn't afraid of being friendzoned and if it made her happy, so be it. That's why she loved him. He gave her happiness and freedom. He only wanted the best for her, even it if meant sacrificing his own happiness.

But what did she give him? She managed to convince him that he was someone, a being that deserved happiness and life. She convinced him that it wasn't his fault something happened to him when he was only a child. That he wasn't a monster who deserved death. But someone who was a wonderful and amazing person, regardless of what he was.

Her head filled with these loving and gentle thoughts and she realized that he could love him again. But not so quickly nor easily. That timeless smile and warm eyes. Gentle kisses and hugs. Delicate letters and poems written for her. The face he gave her whenever he wanted to be mad, but just couldn't. Like the day shed hidden away all of his chocolates and tea. Dancing in the rain, regardless of the cold, because the world was warmer when she was with him.

A soft knock sounded at the door, if the person knocking knew that she wouldn't answer. She wondered why this person would knock if he had the keys. They also had magic. She stood to answer it. She picked up her wand from the coffee table and gripped it tightly. Her hand shook, because she knew who it was.

"Who is it?" she tried to ask with an air of authority, so far it wasn't succeeding.
"Someone who needs to apologize." the voice on the other side said remorsefully. 

As she opened the door, her wand was pointed at person at entering her house. Remus Lupin was glancing at his feet, not looking her in the eye. She squinted at him suspiciously. He must've felt his glare on her, because he rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"Dora," she didn't look at him and pretending to clean up the table, something she never did, "I'm sorry... can you forgive me?"
"Sorry doesn't exactly cut it, Remus." she glared at him from the corner of her eye. She sniffed, wiping her eye, "I'm going to bed. It's late. You can sleep in the bedroom or on the couch. It's your choice."
He grasped her wrist, "Dora... please. I don't know how I'll make it up to you. And I know that you hate me with all your heart. You have every reason to. But please, please don't ignore me. Please..."
"I'll forgive you when you prove to me that you're truly sorry and that you really care." She looked away painfully and headed to the bedroom, closing her eyes, trying to forget what was happening.

Hey everyone! I hope you're enjoying the story so far! We're nearing the end and this is really upsetting because this is one of the my favorite ships to write for. No question today, just smile whenever you see someone looking down, they'll appreciate it.
-Abby