Too much too young

Happy New year

As I take my seat beside Donnie i shake my head a little, it still seems so strange that we are spending new years eve with my ex and his family. If you were to tell me I would be here 3 years ago i would have laughed in your face.

I look around at the familiar faces and   return their smiles, I inwardly cringe when I see angel. Angels a magician so you expect him to be flamboyant but today's ensamble is something else. He's dressed head to toe in white leather, black and white tassels hang from his arms. He looks like a mix between a cowboy and a member of a motorbike club. I especially can't take my eyes off the military looking cap that sits on his head. I nudge Donnie who smirks when he catches a look. Angels mother catches my eyes and shakes her head before shrugging, she's even lost for words and that's a big feat.

The room is full of eccentric characters, Donnie and I look so out of place here as does angels family. I had chosen a tight fitting red spandex dress that hardly left me able to breath and Donnie wore a tux with a red bow tie but we still looked square compared to the other guests.

The room is decorated just like I had imagined it to be, dark with black drapes hung everywhere. A few red candles are scattered creating just the right amount of light. Its so mysterious and yet so sexual that I feel kind of uncomfortable being in this tight dress surrounded by so many people. The room would make a perfect porno set, I imagine Johnny personally chose everything. It screamed Johnny, it was his personality. Its almost painful to be here, for a short time this ranch had been my home. I had mentally decorated the whole place, I had imagined my future here. I had envisioned my future children running across the acres of land as the horses followed in their enclosure. I have a happy life with Donnie and our children and I wouldn't change it for the world but thinking of what could have been still stings.

"you OK kid " Donnies deep voice brings me back down to earth, I feel guilty instantly. He had caught me thinking of my ex only he doesn't know it.

"yeah lurch" I smirk

Donnie rolls  his eyes at my using Johnny's nickname for him. I feel a little more at ease, the humour is helping or maybe it's the wine.

Donnie looks around the room, he doesn't say what he's looking for but I know. He's looking for Johnny, we may have cleared the air with him but  it'd still awkward when the two of them are in the same room. The last time we saw him was during a party at a mutual friends and they almost came to blows, it took a lot of begging and many sexual favours to convince Donnie to attend tonight.

"best behavior remember" I whisper in his ear, his breath hitches as my breath his his neck. I love that I still have this effect on him, we may be parents now but that hasn't slowed down our love life.

" it's him who needs warning" he grunts. He's not wrong, the last time we saw Johnny he had provoked Donnie. After one too many shots he proceeded to show my husband the tattoo he had of me practically naked that still resides on his body. He had told Donnie about the time we had sex in his car outside the stadium where Donnie played, that didn't go down well. In my defence It was days after wills wedding and Donnie had been a dick.

"why are we here"

I ignore Donnies question, he knows why I accepted the invitation. For two days we had argued before he finally agreed to join me.

"Derrick, Emily its so fabulous to see you" angel says as he stops at our table. He kisses both my cheeks before he moves to Donnie who quickly offers his hand. In true angel fashion he kisses it instead of shaking it.

"angel you know his name is Donnie" I correct with a smile, he pulls this every time and every time Donnie huffs.

"are you sure, Derrick suits him so much more. So have you seen our host'

I shake my head, I've not actively been looking but I'm sure if Johnny was in the room I would notice him.

" no have you"

Angel nods before he surpresses a small giggle "wait till you see what he's wearing, some one needs to tell him what a fool he looks"

Donnie almost chokes on his beer. He can hardly control the laughter that threatens to spill out.

Angel leaves us, we know less than what we did before if that's even possible. Donnie and I had our suspicions but by the look of the room and how formal the whole event is I think it's safe to assume he's going to announce Vicky and him are getting married.

I see Angels Mom heading towards the front of the room, I overhear someone questioning what was happening and she declared that she genuinely had no idea.

"she looks as confused as us kid" Donnie says as he gestures over to her.

"maybe he's gonna propose" I suggest.

"maybe but why would we want to witness that"

Donnie has a point, it would be a little strange if my ex had invited us to a party to watch him propose to his new girlfriend.

As if he knew that we were speaking of him he strides to the front of the room, he's so full of Confidence. He looks like the man I met all those years ago, like the man who didn't struggle with drink and drugs. Could it be, could he really be clean.

"he looks different"

If Donnie has noticed then it must be obvious. There's a definite change in him. He looks happy and theirs a spring in his step.

  "heads up he's got a microphone, it might be over early enough that we can hit mick jaggers party"

I elbow him in the stomach "were not leaving its obviously important so we're here all night"

Johnny stands on the stage and taps the mic, the room stills and all attention turns to him. "thank you for coming out here tonight, I know it's new years eve and you've all probably had a hundred party offers so I'm so happy you decided to come here. I have a very important announcement, what I'm about to say is life changing and I hope I can count on all of your support. " he takes a pause for dramatic effect. The room is on the edge of their seats waiting for his life changing announcement. Nothing could have prepared me for what he said.

" I've not taken drugs in 5 months and I have also decided to give up all alcohol "

The room bursts into applause, I can see that Donnie is dying to comment. I have to admit that I also can't help but go think that it won't last very long. I hate to be so negative but I know Johnny too well.

" so I hope all my friends and family can support me through this journey. So now the boring bits out of the way we can enjoy our night."

He raises a glass in the air before he declares "happy new year"

He downs his glass, it looks suspiciously like champagne.

"oh fuck I didn't realise it was alcohol. Well fuck it not drinking can be my resolution", he laughs and takes another glass from a passing waiter.

"OK we can go" I tell Donnie as I tug at his elbow.

Donnie is laughing so I can't guarantee that I heard him correctly but I'm sure he said  "now it really will be a happy new year"