It's Up To You And Me (Loki Laufeyson x Reader)

20

Your POV

Loki and I have left the cafe and it's been five minutes since we've departed. Since then, we've been chatting up casually while walking along the streets in the growing evening cold. I hug myself from the temperature drop and heave out a rough exhale. "We better hurry."

We cross the pedestrian lane and he goes by my side with his brows drawn together. "It's not even that cold at the moment."

"Easy for you to say," we step out of the lane and make our way through another sidewalk, "you were born to such a temperature." I hear him elicit a bemused chuckle. "Jotunheim is a lot colder than this. Can't you just manipulate your own body heat to an extent?"

"I would if I could."

"You can bring fire to do what you will but can't use it to warm yourself?" He inquires in a teasing tone. I shrug quickly and earn a Cheshire-cat like grin from the man. "Wow, you really weren't paying attention to our lessons."

I really can't take the cold tonight and so I pick up our pace by grabbing his hand and pulling him to walk faster. "Loki, I'm nearly dysfunctional under these temperatures. You should've known that by now."

"I would have if you'd let me know you without retreating." The tone of his voice suddenly drops into a disheartened one and I stop in my tracks, making him do the same. He just brought the idea up and I didn't shield myself from that one. I fight back a sigh and turn to look at him, a little aware that he's wrapped his fingers around mine. I don't know what to make of his expression. Either he's trying to delay our return to the Tower or he's dreaded himself to let a certain feeling wash over him.

The strong urge to let him hold my hand like that clashes with my half-assed urge to withdraw and I let the latter win. I take out my hand from his gentle hold yet he grabs it again. "I meant every word I said in the woods that night." He asserts in a definite manner and the difficulty of trusting his words takes over me. "Loki. Why couldn't you just let it go? "

"Because I don't want to."

"I thought such a feeling would be futile to you."

"And it was! Until you," He squeezes my hand gently as he takes in the sight of me staring back at him with wide eyes. "You're one of the very few that  cared to ask how I was and actually took the time to understand my complexities. However different we may be, you've become quite a light to me in a span of months and I admittedly hated how I felt about you in the days we've progressed in training," he pauses and licks his bottom lip, "the sentiment I picked up, it was disgusting to me until that night I laid injured."

He takes my other hand and gives it a light squeeze as well, sending a spark shooting through me. "Y/N...you're the warmth that's in my heart. You've been since the day we met."

Why is it so hard for me to trust him?

I keep my eyes locked on his and remain speechless for a couple of seconds before completely withdrawing my hands from his hold, preventing yet another mindless combustion from giving him a third scorch mark. The breeze brushing against my face makes me shiver and I turn around, closing my eyes briefly. "We're of opposing elements, Loki. One prone to hurting the other."

"I'd take every scorch mark possible."

"It's not just that, okay? There are other things that hinder such a possibility."

"Y/N," he places his hand on my shoulder, making me wince at the suddenness, "...you can just say you don't feel the same way," my heart just shattered at that, "I understand. I'm the last person you'd want to trust."

He figured it out.

But he doesn't know how badly I'm fighting the temptation to wrap my arms around him and tell him all the things I actually feel about him.