Touken Ranbu on Crack [2]

TKRB the Musical

((On a side note, since i'm also kicked out of the fandom, i had little to no access to TKRB. So, new chapters would most probably not contain any new swords after Sengo and the cute boi that wears aprons and likes children. ))

Yasu: hey i heard that Takara-san likes musicals.

Hasebe: rlly?

Yasu: yeah.

Takara: and i heard you two plotting smthn

Hasebe: *high pitch screaming* *higher than Freddie Mercury* *higher than Marriah Carrey* *higher than Whitney Houston* *includes vibrato*

Yasu: *dramatic shock pose*

Takara: ....*elmo meme face* well.

Hasebe: i'm sorry.

Takara: no actually u were ready for this special after all.

Hasebe: huh?

Kashuu: *sassy tone* ARE WE GONNA HAVE A PROBLEM?!

Yasu: !!!?

*boom*

Kashuu: YOU'VE GOT A BONE TO PICK?!?!

*boom*

Kashuu: *does sassy movements to sass them all out* You've come so far. Why now are you PULLING ON MY DICK?!?!

*boom*

Hasebe: *whispers* ....I'm terrified.

Kashuu: i'd normally slap your face off. And everyone here could watch! But i'm feeling nice here's some advice. listen up, BIATCH!

*musical number plays*

Kashuu: OMG WHERE ARE THOSE BITCHES.

Souza and Midare: *rushes beside Kashuu and does back up dancer movements*

Then the Tantous emerged

Tantous: *does different kinds of acrobats*

Imano: *leads their crazy acrobats*

Tantous: *does parkour flips but musical*

Tantous but Imano's voice is louder: It's a hard knock life-for-us! It's a hard knock life for us! Instead of kisses, WE GET KICKED!

Kashuu: *kicks Gokotai*

Gokotai: ooow...

Tantous: Instead of being treated, WE GET TRICKED!

Nama: *slaps poo on Yagen's face*

Imano: guys lift me higher and closer to Mr. Warbucks.

Iwatoshi: Can't believe I'm Mr. Warbucks.

Imano: *beautiful singing* The sun will come out tomorrow

CCP: Takara u should be Mary Poppins.

Takara: OH I WILL HAVE A MUSICAL ALRIGHT *unleashes too much Musical fangirl-ness* *EVIL LAUGHS HAHAHAHAHA*

CCP: well ok.

Jiji: *gets spotlight* AN ETERNAL PHLEGMMMMMMM!!!

Kogi: Jiji wrong song

Jiji: oh aha...YOU! AND YOU! AND YOU!! YOU'RE GONNA LOVE ME!!! *drowns in flowers*

CCP: *takes over stage* Oh there's my Hubby right there. *points Hasebe* The President of Argentina. *sings beautifully* Don't cry for me Argentina! The truth is I never left youuuuu

Souza: *interupts* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-OOOH!!!

Everyone: *imitates him*

Souza: alright!!! WEEEEE ARE THE CHAMPIONS MY FRIEND!!!

Ishipapa: *falls softly from the sky with Umbrella* Hello Everyone! I am miss Mary Poppins!

*snow starts*

Kane-san: *angry new yorker voice* OH GREAT YOU MAKE ME SPILL MY COFFEE!!!

Hasebe: *real romantic phase*

Takara: oh wow is cold! Is it Frozen next?

Hasebe: *being really romantic* *soft sexy voice* Stay for the night, baby...

Takara: *realization* (oh it's this song.) *sings along* I really can't  stay

Hasebe: *so sexy ryt now i wanna strangle him* Baby it's cold outside

Takara: *really doesn't wanna stay* I gotta go away

Hasebe: *persistent and sexy* Baby it's cold outside...

Takara: no really. I can't cause one, I am asexual, two, my song is coming up next, and three, I am NOT THROWING AWAY MY SHOT!

Doudanuki, Shishiou, Urashima: *forced to join in*

Takara: rap along with me

Takara, Donut, Mufasa, Urashima: U KNO I'M JUST LIKE MY COUNTRY I'M YOUNG SCRAPPY AND HUNGRY. I AM NOT THROWING AWAY MY SHOT.

Gine: oh i like Hamilton! Let ne tell you what I wish I've known when I was young and dreamed of glory. You have no control who lives, who dies, who tells your stor--

Takara: YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!!! *throws a banana at him*

Gine: :( *Red blondehead song plays for him in BG*

Tonbo: *hugs him in motherly way with his MUSCLES!* *sings beautifully* Somewhere over the rainbow...Blue birds fly...

Hotaru: sorry to interupt but Akashi

Akashi: yas?

Hotaru: um. Kuri and I r dating now.

Akashi: WOT.

Kuri: i love Hotaru sir.

Akashi: BOI WOT IS UR NAME

Kuri: Marius.

Akashi: Bring him HOOOOOOOOOOME

Tarou: *Hotaru's true mom* *appears slowly*

Akashi: *dramatic why is my child dating now scene*

Tarou: *sings with a magical voice* *flies above them* I dream a dream-- UGHCK *hits his face*

*Lion king "The Lion sleeps tonight" plays but only the "hiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiih ah eee abambuuweeeeeh" part*

Kashuu: I AM NOT DONE YET.

Hakata: nope we're done.

-end