Healing Broken Wings [Daryl Dixon] The Walking Dead

Ten| Are You Drunk?

🌱Kristina🌱

I lay in my tent, listening to the crickets. When Shane returned with the equipment that would save Carl, he informed the group that Otis died covering Shane. Another person has once again died. I grab the bottle of bourbon and take a drink. I just can't fall asleep. Before Sophia, I would have been as close to the group as possible but Dean and I set up my tent a good distance away from the group.

I think everyone is noticing how I'm withdrawing from them because everyone is going out of their way to talk to me and cheer me up. Frankly, the only one I actively talk to is Dean, at least he talks to me like a normal person. I sit up as a cough racks my frame. I groan once it subsides, resting my forehead on my knees.

Daryl still treats me like a stranger. I feel like a lesser person than I was before and I know people if they heard this would think I'm being stupid letting a guy get to me like this. But that's not it. Daryl always made me feel like I can do anything, he made me believe in myself. Frankly, how can I believe in myself when Daryl can't even stand to be around me anymore.

Which is why I can't help it when Dean shows me attention. He wants to be around me even if I try to push him away. It makes me feel better. Dean doesn't see a stranger when he looks at me, or a little girl, he sees me as an equal. Something I don't see when Daryl looks at me.

I take another drink before laying back down. I curl up, resting my head on my jacket, using it as my pillow. I close my eyes and drift to sleep.

I leave my tent and begin walking towards where Daryl set up his tent. It's even farther away from the group. I find him, messing with his crossbow. "I think we should talk." He doesn't even look up from his weapon. "There's nothing to talk about." I step forward and rip the crossbow from his hands and he gazes up at me with indifference.

"Well, I say there is! Why are you acting like this? Huh?! Why are you icing me out?" Daryl stands up. "I have nothing to say," he says turning away. "You don't get to walk away from me, Daryl!" I scream at him and he whips around. "Are you deaf! I want nothing to do with you! I don't want you here! Just go!"

I jolt upright in my blankets. I feel blind and stumble out of my tent in panic, not registering where I am. The sunlight blinds me and I'm even more disoriented. "Woah, whoa. Kris, are you okay? Are you drunk?" My vision clears, I see Daryl in front of me, my dream is still fresh in my mind, he grabs my arm gently, I assume attempting to steady me.

Tears come to my eyes and I rip my arm out of his grip. "Don't touch me!" I cough before stumbling away from him. "Kris!" I feel another hand on my arm and relax when I hear Andrea's voice. I sink to my knees, my heart racing and feeling shortness of breath. "I think she's hyperventilating," Andrea says and Daryl crouches down in concern.

"What the hell happened?" Andrea asks Daryl, almost accusingly. "I don't know. She comes bursting out of her tent like a walker was chasing her. She didn't seem to know where she was, she almost seemed drunk to me. When I tried to steady her she freaked out more."

"Kristina, honey, breathe. Take deep breaths I know you can do it."

"What's going on?" I hear Rick's voice before he's crouching in front of me. I cough violently before going back to gasping. "I think she's having a panic attack, she's hyperventilating."

"Has this ever happened before?" Rick asks looking at Daryl who shakes his head. "No."

"She's never been in this kind of emotional state either," Andrea says accusingly, glaring at Daryl. Rick leans down to my eye level. "Okay, Kristina, just force yourself to breathe." He demonstrates by taking deep breaths. I force myself to calm down and breathe deeply before exhaling. It takes a few tries before my gasping subsides.