(TRIGGER WARNING!)
Your POV
I feel numb. Totally numb with sadness. Everything was getting to me. I picked up a piece of paper and a pencil, getting ready to write my last words and thoughts.
"I hated the feeling of being numb with sadness. It always consumed me in a way you'd think you were drowning. Well that's technically what's happening. What started it all, I have no clue, but I remember one time when someone asked me how my day was. I couldn't trust my voice to say "good". I remember trying so hard not to cry, but the tears were already there and I managed a small fake smile. All the fake people in the world, saying they have your back when they really don't. Lying to you about something you really want to know the truth about, that really hurts too. One person who was there for it all was Shawn. No matter what you stood by my side when no one else did. I know we just kinda met, but you helped me even though you weren't there physically. Listen before I go, I love you. Goodbye."
Tears poured down my face as I wrote the last line. I've thought about writing that in here, but actually writing it... It's so sad.
I get in some old clothes, fill the bathtub, get a razor, and get in the full bath. I sob uncontrollably as I make the first cut. It hurt so much but the thing I hear next breaks me.
"Y/n? Where are you?" I hear Shawn call.
I make another cut on my other wrist, letting the blood flow into the tub. Frantic footsteps come up the stairs, Shawn calling my name.
The door opens and Shawn falls to his knees next to the tub.
"Baby, baby. No no no. Baby stay with me, stay with me. I love you please stay with me," Shawn sobs.
He grabs the first aid kit and starts to help me out of the blood water filled tub. Small whimpers escape my lips as he does this. Shawn treats my self inflicted wounds as he looks at me worriedly and concerned.
"Baby, why would you do this? There are so many people who love you and care for you. What is it that I need to do?" Shawn says.
"They never show it enough. They never show me how they feel, they never tell me. I'm always around a small group of people at all times and not everyone shows it," I reply.
"I love you so much. I don't wanna see you in a casket just yet. Or ever," Shawn said, kissing me.
I kiss back. How did I get so lucky?
