I was still hooked up to an IV, my body still weak, I had lost a lot of weight over the weeks after Christmas. The doctors said I had contracted a virus and my body was just to weak to fight it off. The doctors were keeping me in for another the week to monitor me and how I was coping, I was still weak and I could walk properly. I also still had a concussion, I threw up a lot. I was tired all the time and I felt like I was just getting worse.
"Hey." Auston said as he peeked his head through the door. I had been in hospital for the past 6 days (including the days I was passed out.) and this was the first time I was seeing Auston, part of me was hurt he wasn't showing up but I knew he and the guys were busy.
"Hey." I said with a weak smile, he walked into the room with a stuffed bear and a card. I pouted and smiled as he handed me the things. "Thank you." I said as I began to open the card, smiling as I read everyone's names and messages in the card, trying my best not to cry. When I looked up at Auston, he had tears in his eyes as he examined me closely. "What's wrong?" I asked and he just looked me in the eye.
"Lilly, you were sick and I never even knew. I mean Patty and Mo had pointed out that they thought you were loosing weight but I shrugged them off. I didn't pay attention." He said and I just smiled at him softly.
"Matts, my health isn't for you to worry about, it's for me to worry about. I was stupid, hurting and I just kind of lost the plot for a while. I never realised that I'd end up ill, but here I am. This isn't your fault, it's no one's fault." I said and Auston looked away, shaking his head.
"It's Mitch's." Auston said and I chuckled weakly, making Auston look at me confused as I let my head rest shading my pillow, suddenly it felt to heavy for my shoulders.
"It's not Mitch's fault, Aus. It's no one's fault." I repeated and he just sighed and nodded, he wiped his eyes and motioned for me to scoot over and I did. He climbed into the bed next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder.
"You'll never guess what Babcock said to Mo." He said and I just smiled and waited for him to continue. Glad he was here.
***
My dad had called me and told me he was getting the next flight home the day I woke up. I told him not too, he had important meetings in Calgary and I wasn't dying so he didn't really have to be here. He called me in the morning and during the day, sometimes at night if he wasn't doing anything. The doctors were concerned at how ill I was getting. They had a few ideas what was going on but weren't going to jump into the idea until they knew exactly what was going on.
I on my 8th day, I had seen most of the guys. Each one of them coming in with a bright smile and a hug, it made me so much happier to have them around. Naz has brung me a large bear that I cuddled when I slept, it smelled of the changing rooms and I wasn't complaining to be honest. It was on the 9th day that Mitch showed up, I was scrolling through Instagram with my head laid on the large bear when he peeked his head through the door, I hadn't realised until he was fully through the door, shutting it as I looked up.
"Mitch." I whispered as he quickly made his way to the chair by the side of the bed. Before I could speak, he did, looking up at me with those sad eyes filled with tears and his flushed face. He had been chewing his lips and I could tell.
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry about what happened at Christmas, the sudden realisation that you weren't going to be around at some point hit me hard one day when you were playing with Patty's kid. That moment hit me so hard. Then when we were at the lake house, you were our with the guys and Freddie had picked you up and I just couldn't swallow the feelings I felt. I was worried about loosing you, then I did. I didn't know what I was doing. I'm sorry I never came to the hospital, I didn't know what to do. Auston told me you were getting worse and I didn't want to face you, knowing I had done this." Mitch said quickly. Stray tears running down his face, making me weakly reach over and wipe the tears from his eyes.
"It's not your fault, Mitch. As I told Auston, it's no one's fault, I failed my body for awhile and now it's getting back at me. It's only fair." I said chuckling weakly, stopping when I started to feel sick.
"Lilly, if I hadn't of acted the way I had when we were at the lake house, you wouldn't have been in this situation." Mitch said and I smiled at him gently.
"Maybe so, Mitch. But out of all of this situation, the thing that hurts the most, was the fact that you thought that when I left, I'd forget about you and the guys. Like that was so easy to do." I said and he looked at me. "Mitch those guys are my family, those guys are my friends, I may not have known them for as long as you have or as long as Auston has, but they are my family and there is no way I'd forget them." I said and he let his head fall slightly. "And you, you ducking idiot." I whispered, teary eyed. "I love you so much, Mitchy. More than I know how to express. You think I'd be able to forget your god awful singing that easy?" I asked with a smile and he just chuckled.
"That would be hard to forget." He said smiling as he wiped his eyes. When he was done laughing at me, he looked at me, like properly looked at me. I placed my hand on his cheek and he pressed his hand against mine, leaning into my hand and closing his eyes.
"I love you, Marner." I whispered.
