kleinsen One Shots (Rewriting)

good for you

Tears stream down my cheeks like rivers and collect at the underside of my chin as Mrs. Hansen talks to her son. She really doesn't deserve this. Fuck, I don't deserve this either. I've been a pretty shit person to evan, but damn! He was my only friend. There. I said it. And he just... he just left me in the dirt. I choke on a sob. If it wasn't for my hacking skills he would have been absolutely fucked! And, and I didn't even get a thank you! He just took what he needed and dipped. What a fucking dick move.

"Now you're free from the 'agonizing' life you were living before Evan!" She yells. In all my years of knowing her, I've never once heard her yell like that. Especially directed at Evan."You got what you always wanted! You got your dream come true! Good for you Evan! Now you've got a real family! Now you've got everything don't yah? Fuck Evan! You don't care who you hurt do you!? As long as you're happy! As long as you get what you want. You know there's, there is an absolutely heart broken boy in that room! Somebody who actually cares about you! And you don't even give a fuck! He came to apologise to YOU! but for what!? For you to make him feel like what he's the one that needs to apologise! Grow the fuck up Evan!"

Fuck.

"Shit!" I mumble pacing around the kitchen, frantically whipping at the still flowing tears coming from my eyes. After about two seconds of trying that I just gave up and stand still. I don't care if he sees me crying any more.

"Jare, jared?" I feel him staring at me, but I'm too busy looking at my shoes to pay it any mind. "You said what you needed to say! And you played who you needed to play. I was just 'in your way' so you crushed me and left me to burn! But, but hey! If I'm not of use to you anymore. Go ahead! Cut me lose! Go ahead! I don't mind!" I finally look up making sure not to look at his face. He steps forward and puts his hand out cautiously.

"Jare, jare?" Anger builds up inside of me. "NO! You don't have the right, yan can't call me that anymore!" He visiblely flinches and puts his hand down. Finally building up the courage, i look at him. His hair is a complete mess, which is very unusual for him, his blue eyes are all red and puffy, there are tears running down his face and his nose is running. Yet, he still manages to be really fucking hot. God damnit that is so aggravating."Sor,sor, sor-" I cut him off. "You should be! You know, you are the only person I have ever loved! And you just, you just, tossed me aside for some, some girl! You didn't even know her! You made, you made me feel like I was the one doing something wrong. You're such an asshole!" The last part of the sentence was mostly drowned out by a completely heartbroken sob.

Wait, did I just- "you... You love me?" SHIT! Shit shit shit shit shiiiiit! "Wh-what?" He looked deep into my eyes. "You said, you said, you said you you you you l-lo..." He trails off. My face goes bright fucking red. Fuck. Guess the cats outta the bag now. I shrink down in defeat and hug my knees on the floor. He kneels down and places his hand on my shoulder making me flinch away from him. He tries again, and I don't say no. He pulls me into a hug and I don't try to stop him. Instead, I just pull him closer and cry my heart out nuzzling my face in the crook of his neck and just let myself be vulnerable.

"Sh sh sh, it's ok Jared, it's ok," he whispers soothingly as he rubs unknown shapes into my shirt. "It-it'll be ok." He places his hand in my hair making me shake my head. "Don't get our current position wrong asshole I'm still livid." He pushes me away a little and takes my glasses off. They must've been digging into his neck. Wish I knew I'd've taken advantage of it.

After about five minutes I remember our current situation. I push him off and stand up. He follows suit. "Jared I'm sorry! I was an asshole! I...I don't want to lose you." He looked so helpless, I almost want to forgive him.

"You should have thought about that then, huh." I turn to leave but he grabs my wrist and I pull it away from him. "Jare, jare- I mean Jared, please please," he stares into my eyes. His are full of sorrow and regret. "Please don't go..." I look deep into his, slightly blurry, eyes, not liking the way his tears have obscured the blue color. I really, really don't want to forgive him, and I don't.

"God damnit Evan! Why do you make me feel like this you fucking bastard!?" He looks at me with a confused face. "What, what do you, you, you mean?" I groan. "You make me feel. Like fuckin shit! But also really important? Stop it you fuck!" He chuckles. 

"Stop laughing! I'm serious!" He smiles down at me. "I make you feel important because you are to me."

"Sure didn't seem like it when you were ditching me for months." I bend down and snatch my glasses from the floor. 

"I fucking hate you with every fiber of my being." He looks like a dog that's just been kicked. I scowl, stomp over to him and grab the collar of his polo. "Jared i-"  I kiss him. I don't know why I do, but I kiss him.

"God damnit Evan you make my feelings so complicated you bitch" he kisses me again, and I let him.