They saw each other first on the train. And then in the same cafe, and then in the same meeting room. He disliked her loud music, she disliked his attitude. Their opinions will have to change when she's hired to work with him.
Rules will be broken...
Shawn Mendes There was something about her. She's different. Something about her intrigued me. She wasn't famous and I liked that. She was just a small town girl, with this being her first hint at fame. She was shy and unsure of herself, and part of me liked that. The other realistic side of me was worried for her. If she received hate I wouldn't be there to comfort her. She'd be in the U.K. I'd be be all around Europe. I hated the idea of that. I was scared myself. Scared what the fans are going to say, scared about how I feel for her, scared about having to leave home for tour. But I was scared about leaving her. She was the piece that made me feel normal. Like I was just back to being Shawn. No expectations.
"You're quiet" She said as we walked into the house. "I'm just thinking" I shrugged. "That's dangerous" she giggled and I nudged her away slightly. I didn't know what I wanted to say to her. So many things were rushing around my mind. Out of all the things I could have said, I chose the most mundane one. "Do you want anything?" I asked and she shrugged. "I'm actually ok thank you." She smiled. We walked into my living area and sat down quietly next to each other. "Can I ask you something?" She asked. "Of course you can. You know you can" I smiled. "Why did you invite me over?" She sighed and I felt a sense of panic. I didn't know what to say. There was so many things that I had to say to her before we parted ways but they wouldn't come out. I couldn't bring myself to tell her all of the things I felt. I wanted to tell her that I didn't want to leave her. I wanted to tell her that I loved the way I felt when I was around her. I wanted to know how she felt. I wanted to see how it went. I wanted to try. "Shawn?" Her voice pulled me back into the moment and I ran my hands through my hair slowly. "Sorry" "Why did you invite me?" She asked again. All I could do was shrug. "Because I like spending time with you?" I said and scolded myself for not saying anything useful. "Ok?" She said, mocking my questioning tone. "I'm sorry I just," "Somethings on your mind I can tell" she said and I sighed. "There is" "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked and I noticed her shuffle in her seat so she was facing me, with crossed legs. "I don't know. I don't think I can" I said feeling shy. "Can't or won't?" She said. "Can't" "I'm not going to judge you Shawn am I?" She said and gently placed her hand over mine.
"You do something" I blurted out. "You make me feel normal." "You are normal" "Yeah but like not famous. When I'm with you I feel like I'm just Shawn. Not the famous Shawn Mendes." I explained as her face remained very neutral, giving me a sense of anxiety. I couldn't read how she felt. This was the first time I couldn't read what she felt. I had started talking now. I couldn't stop. "You're not famous and I love that we can just be like this and no one know who you are, I love the way you're shy and unsure of yourself. But I'm scared. I'm scared of my team and what they would say. I'm scared of you getting hurt. I'm scared about leaving you and not seeing you again. And I'm scared about what you'll say and what you think"
My heart was racing and I had to try slow my breathing down as I waited for a response. Still she remained neutral. I noticed her lips fall apart slightly and I watched as she fiddled with her hands in her lap. "Say something. Please" I said needing clarification of what she was thinking. "I'm not sure what to say." She said with a small smile. "I don't know what this means" "What do you mean?" I asked putting my arm over the back of the couch. "Well I can't really beat around the bush here. Are you saying that you want to date me? Or are you just saying that you like me and that's all there is. Or is it more, I like you, I kind of want to date but can't because I'm Shawn Mendes?" She said, that small unsure smile that drove my heart to flutter playing on her lips. "I don't mean to say this and sound rude at all. But if I want to date you and you want to date me then that's what matters. It doesn't matter that I'm the Shawn Mendes. If I like you then I like you. I'm just worried about you and the team if we dated" I explained further. "Would you want to date me? I know I've said all this before but I'm not anyone famous or anything like that" she said and I shook my head at her words. "I wouldn't care if you didn't" I shrugged. "Not particularly I guess" she shrugged back.
The silence that followed was deafening. Neither of us knew what to say. We both knew where we wanted it to go. Neither of us wanted to be bold. I heard once that all you need is thirty seconds of insane courage and something great will come of it. But I couldn't find those thirty seconds within me. It was a lot easier said than done. I could feel the words on the top of my tongue but still couldn't say it. "Would you be embarrassed to be seen with me in that way?" She piped up and immediately I shook my head no. "Of course I wouldn't" She nodded at my words of reassurance and I sighed as my hands got sweaty and my legs got restless. "Would you like to go on a date? With me?" I asked slowly. The wait for her response was the hardest part of the evening.
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