Victorie (Urban Fiction)

Chapter 30

It seemed like the whole hood had come out to see CeCe off. "You did a great job," Mama J whispered as we sat on the front row at CeCe's services. "My baby is beautiful." She squeezed my hand before she was called to the front to say a few words.
"It's good to know that all of you had so much love for my CeCe. As you all know, this is the second loss that my family has suffered in just a matter of weeks. And even though I'm hurt and missing both of my babies, I know that God will get me through. And I want you to know that God can get you through anything too. I thank you all for coming. Before we leave here, I'm gonna ask her best friend Victorie to come up and give us a few words, and a sing us a song."
I tried to hand Tashyra off, but she wrapped her arms tightly around my neck so I carried her up to the podium with me.
"I really wasn't expecting this," I started. "I wasn't expecting to be planning a funeral, standing at this podium, or to be laying my best friend to rest today. CeCe and I have been best friends since first grade. Thick as thieves. We were always there for each other, but honestly I felt like I wasn't there for her like she needed me to be during her last days. I beat myself up every other day for that. Yesterday I believe God sent a message to me through someone else, and I'm sharing it with you today. Sometimes God takes people so He can heal them whether it's physically or emotionally. CeCe received the healing that we couldn't give her, and I find comfort in that. My heart is broken and I'm crying only because I know that this is the last time that I'll see her. I'll love and always remember CeCe until I take my last breath." I took a minute to breathe and get myself together. "This song I'm gonna sing is one that CeCe and I used to sing for Mama J."
I sang "Give Me Jesus" as Tashyra rested her head on my shoulder.

CeCe was buried in the cemetery across from Holy Haven Baptist Church. All the other people attending the funeral had left the grave site and were attending the repast, but I was still sitting there crying. "We gotta go baby," Jaison said wrapping his arms around me. "I know it's hard. Your mama and Mama J are worried about you. They blowing my phone up."
"Ok," I said slowly getting up. We walked across the street to the church's dining hall.
"I thought I was gone have to walk over there," my mama said looking at me with sadness and concern.
"I'm alright mama," I said. "Just didn't want to leave her."
"I know baby," she rubbed my back.
"You ok Joy?" I asked noticing that she was holding onto Zuri and crying.
"I'm just sad," she said. "And worried about you."
"I'm ok baby," I said hugging her. "I don't want you to worry about me."
Just then Tashyra came running over to me with Mama J right behind her.
"I'm too old to be running up behind you girl," she fussed.
"It's ok Mama J," I said. "I got her."
"Did you eat yet?" Mama J asked me.
"I'm not hungry," I answered.
"You gotta eat something," she said. "Jaison come on so I can make y'all a plate."
A few minutes later, they returned with plates of fried chicken, baked chicken, dirty rice, salad, and cake plus bottled water.
"This is good," I said tasting a piece of baked chicken.
"Ain't it though," Jaison said digging into his food.
Everybody was talking, mingling, and enjoying each other's company until we heard Miss Martha and April.
"Don't you get nan nother piece of chicken!!" Miss Martha hollered at April.
"But mama I'm hungry," April whined.
"You done ate a whole chicken," Miss Martha fussed. "If you ain't full by now, then you won't be."
"These people is crazy," I heard my mama whisper to Joy.
Jaison just shook his head.

After the funeral I went home and shut myself up in my room despite Jaison begging me to come home with him. Today was harder than yesterday, and tomorrow would be even harder without my friend. I was missing her so much. Remembering the box of things that Mama J gave me, I decided to go through it. Inside was CeCe's distressed denim jacket, her oversized off the shoulder Aaliyah  t-shirt, some of her earrings, a photo album, and a few of her Fashion Nova jeans. The clothes smelled just like her favorite fragrance. I flipped through the album looking at pics of us from first grade until recently. The last photo was one that we'd taken with Jaison at his party. CeCe believed in making actually physical copies of photos we'd take on her phone. She always said she wasn't risking losing those precious memories. Who knew that I'd end up with these pics under these circumstances?