Moments... (An Ed Sheeran fanfic)

Central Park

Louise's POV

What had I done to deserve him? I had treated him like crap, yet he saw right through me. He refused to give up on me. And I was truly grateful.

It was our third day in New York and I had decided to stay in the spare bedroom. I thought it was for the best and Ed reluctantly agreed. We were still a couple I guess, but I think we both needed a little space for now.

I was sitting on my bed applying cream to my cuts. They really stung. I hadn't cut since I was 16. I thought that time of my life was over. I thought my depression had left me. I guess not. I guess depression never leaves, not really.

"You okay?" Ed popped his head through the door and I turned my face to see him.

"Mhmm." I smiled then turned back to my arm. He walked over towards me and sat next to me on the bed.

"They hurt, yeah?" He asked.

"Sort of." I shrugged.

As soon as I felt the blade touch my skin, a wave of nostalgia washed through me. It felt so good and relieving. I wanted to do it again, and again, and again. That was the thing about cutting, you became addicted very easily.

"They'll heal." Ed assured. "It just takes time."

"Yeah." I nodded. "Ed, can you do something for me?"

"Anything." Ed replied.

"Take these." I reached over to the pile of sharp things that I had collected and placed on my bedside table after putting in a bag. "Throw them away, burn them, hide them. Do whatever. Just...just keep them away from me."

"Sure." Ed took the bag. "I'll take care of it."

"It's just... I don't want the temptation." I confessed.

The bag contained nail scissors, a shaving razor blade, 3 bobby pins and a safety pin. It was everything in my room that I thought could hurt me. I knew there were things elsewhere in the house, but not my room. That was good.

"I get that things are going to be hard..." Ed trailed off.

I could tell he felt awkward and confused. He wasn't used to this...whatever 'this' was. The cancer, the cutting, the almost break up.

"It doesn't matter. Things will always be hard, but I don't care." I told him.

"We'll get through this." He said.

"Together." I promised.

"Are you sure you still want to stay in New York? I can easily book a flight." He told me.

"No. I want to stay here and just forget about the cancer, just for a little longer." I told him.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I just want to forget about it for now. Can we not talk about it until we get back to England?" I asked.

"That sounds good." He smiled.

"And just forget everything that happened yesterday. Pretend that nothing happened. For now at least." I proposed.

"I'd love that a lot actually." Ed agreed.

"Me too." I smiled and put the cream on my bedside table. "So Edwardo, any plans for today?"

"We could do anything. Just say the word." He grinned.

"You'll regret saying that." I replied.

"Why?" He raised his eyebrow.

"I'm in the creative mood. Possibly art?"