Irritated To The Point Of Destruction

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Ashanti

I had a dream that I saw papi coming out of jail, he held me in his arms telling he miss me so much, I told him "I miss you so much too papi. I'm happy that you are free for a feast that mommy made for us for your coming home party" I smile at him. I drive my daddy to the house not telling him what is going to happen, he looks outside of the window then a few minutes later he said "Everything has changed since I've been gone, what have you been up to baby girl?" daddy ask me. "Well daddy, I've been working and I'm taking care of Tae, what are you going to do papi about changing your life?" I ask him, he shrug his shoulders but then I got interrupted by a hand on my body then I got up and see that it is Chocolate, he really pissed me off tonight, it was going good when we were making love then he left and he told that he had Kennon killed, that made me mad because now I'm worried that he will go to jail for something crazy but I don't know how to feel about him right now. I went back to sleep then I had another dream about a mysterious man looking for my dad and he looks like the grim reaper with a hoodie but his face is cover but he said to me "Your father's soul is mine and your will be next" he laughs and I closed the door on him scared out of my mind thinking about how the hell am I going to get out of it. I jumped up out of my dream, damn this shit almost felt real but I hope papi get out so we can be one big happy family again.

"Babe you Alight?" Marquez ask me sitting up. "I had a scary ass dream about a grim reaper coming to get my papi after he gets out of jail but he told me that my papi's soul is his and my soul will be his too" a tear falls from my eyes. That dream is scary as shit because he looks like papi's friend covered in a grim reaper hoodie but that's just a dream, all of this shit is happening and I'm starting to have bad dreams. This is all new to me and I can't remember the last time I had a bad dream, I think about Kennontae and all he's going through. This is one of the scariest things I've experienced. I started thinking about the time when I was five months pregnant with him  and I was with Latrice at the swimming pool, Kennon wasn't there but I saw one of my ex boyfriend's there with his girl, he saw me then walked towards me, I didn't know what to expect but he pushed me in the pool and we started playing around then we had a conversation about what happened to us. I told him that his floozy girlfriend at the time was cock blocking but he chose her over me. That dude was madly in love with me but I guess his girlfriend at the time put it on her but he must've been thinking about being with her, that day made me realize that there is more fish in the pond.

I miss my papi because I never got to see him while he is in jail. Mommy told me not to go see him because it would break my heart, it will bring me to tears because seeing my papi in jail with criminals who did good know what for them to be put in jail and papi talking to me on the other side of the glass will make me ball and cry like crazy. My brothers and mommy want me to stay strong for papi, that's what I'm going to do, I open my eyes for a minute to get that nightmare out of my head. I went back to sleep and saw papi in my dream, hugging me and I look up at him, he says "Don't worry about me baby girl, I'll be fine. When I get out of jail, we are going to catch up" he smiles at me. "Okay papi, I can't wait to see you home, I would be happy when you be home because you can hold me when I'm sad, mommy miss you and you can change your life for us" a tear falls down my eyes. I don't have any memories of papi because he was locked up all of my life that I know of, I remember my brothers being there for me at my plays when I was a little kid. They helped me most of my life which is why I know how my brothers are overprotective of me since I'm the baby and they will always look out for me. I won't lose my faith on papi because I know that he will come to us and he will change for the best of us.

My brothers are my world, I mean without them, I don't know how to do with myself. I know my brothers are bad as hell but I wouldn't trade them for nothing because they had to deal with my bad ass attitudes, when I get mad, they would help me calm down by letting me play video games with them and it would be fun beating they ass in fighting games, when I was sad, they would hold me and make me laugh, they even gave me advice about dating and relationships so I'm happy to have my bros with me, especially twin even though he is one minute apart, his ass would even sing songs to me and dance with me when we would dance, shoot one time, we were in a dance competition when we were little kids, we would dance against the kids in the neighborhood and we would beat the kids in dance competitions with me and my twins, we won a trophy at our talent show and we ate ice cream after the talent show. Mommy love taking us places that we never seen because we want to have fun and explore. I love that I have a strong family who come together and have fun.