My Girl

44

*Arizona* *Slight TW (abuse, rape) towards the end*

Riley and I drove up to the market in a comfortable silence.

"What's for dinner?" She asks.

"I was thinking maybe spaghetti and vegan meatballs, I know how much my sister hates meat."

"That sounds good to me."

Since we were in the middle of nowhere,
it took us about 20 minutes to find one market.

"Callie told me what happened." Her tone was hard to read.

"Z told me what happened too."

I was referring to their "drifting apart" as my sister said. Our situations were the same but different.

I felt like I didn't know who Callie was, we didn't connect and neither did Riley and Zahra.

"How did you forgive her? Have you forgiven her?" She asks.

"I took some time off to think, she's made my life ten times better and we basically have a family together, I can't imagine my life without Callie Torres." I pulled into a parking spot.

"That's sweet, I think the universe wants you two to be together." She says as we walk in.

"Yea, me too." I grabbed a cart and we started searching for the pasta.

30 minutes later

I parked the car in the front and got the grocery bags. Callie and Zahra were sitting on the front porch talking and laughing. I loved the bond that they had.

I could've gone to the market myself, but once I told Zahra about what happened, she sounded like she wanted to kill Callie so I needed them to make up.

Riley and I sat everything down on the counter and got out a few pots and pans before Callie and Zahra came back in.

Callie sat down at the kitchen table.

"Wanna take a swim?" Zahra says to Riley.

I knew my sister too well, she was making Callie and I talk.

Say no Riley, please say no.

"I'd love to." She smiles and they both leave.

They left us in a thick, tense, and uncomfortable silence. I wanted to tell Callie everything about all my relationships and about Ava and Robert and how happy I am to have her.

"I'm sorry." We both say in unison.

We both smiled but hers faded before mine. "Go ahead." She says.

"I want to tell you everything, about my previous relationships and about Ava but I need to know that I can trust you." I turned around and faced her. Her eyes went up really fast and I knew exactly what she was looking at. "And keep your eyes up."

"Seriously, you can trust me, not seriously, the view is amazing."

I took a deep breath in, I could do this. There was no point in hiding my past because Callie is my future.

"Well my first relationship wasn't that bad compared to the other ones but she cheated on me, then my second one would do bad things to me if I didn't do what she said and then Robert came into play." That was surprisingly easy. I didn't go too much into detail just yet.

She looks at me and pats the seat next to her. I sat down and she grabs my hands.

"Arizona, I need you to know that I'm different. I would never even think about hurting you physically or mentally, I love you too much to do that." She stops. "You are truly remarkable."

I really hoped she meant everything she said. Because I'm not ready for another heartbreak. "I know you're different."

She kisses my hand and I get up to finish cooking. I never talk about my past but it eats me inside. I haven't talked about them much after Tim died, only to my sister, Teddy, Carina, and Eliza. But Eliza left me in the dirt that night.

My past relationships weren't even that eventful to talk about. My first one last about 10 months and I was was about 17. I've had a few more smaller relationships after that when I turned 18 but none of them lasted.

One year later Tim died and I never thought I would find happiness. I used sex to forget about everything going on in my life. I didn't go out for about 2 years and only talked to certain people. All of the therapists I went to said I had severe depression and prescribed me with medications to take but none of them ever worked.

I lost all hope in being happy again.

Until my 21st birthday when Teddy and Carina took me to a bar. That was the night I met Dana and my life changed for the worse.

For a good 7 months things were going good, amazing actually. She treated me right and I felt almost happy to be with someone else.

Then one night she got a call from work and she just grew angry out of nowhere. By now I had found a job in a nursing clinic. I was financially stable and she was envious.

If I didn't get home at a certain time, I would me punished. If I didn't buy her the things she wanted then I would get punished. She eventually found a job but it didn't pay as much as mine and that's what made her blood boil. She wanted to be the best at everything.

I covered up more when I went to work and wore turtlenecks for 2 weeks straight because of the bruising. I knew people were staring and whispering but I couldn't let them know. Dana threatened to kill everyone I loved if I told someone.

When I was at my apartment and Dana spent the night, she had gotten fired from her job so she took all her anger and envy out on me. I was screaming so loud the neighbors called the police and locked her up. Now I've forgot how long her sentence is but the investigators promised not to let her near me ever again. Mainly because I have a restraining order.

I spent the rest of my life alone after Dana. Not really looking for a relationship and staying close to my friends and family.

My close friend Eliza from the clinic took me out to a nightclub the day before Valentine's Day for a night out and left me to go to the bathroom and that's when Robert found me. It was save to say that I was pretty wasted, I wanted to forget about Dana and everything she put me through.

Eliza and I knew we couldn't drive so we got an Uber. Robert pulled over and pretended to be our Uber driver. I was too intoxicated to even answer and that night was when he raped me, I had gotten a sense of my surroundings by then and I knew that this was not something I wanted. I repeatedly said no but he didn't care.

The next morning he was gone and I woke up to exactly 53 missed calls from Eliza, 129 missed texts from Eliza, 30 missed calls from Teddy, and 34 missed texts from Carina.

That was the last time I had ever heard from Eliza.

"You're thinking too hard." Callie says.

"I was thinking about my past and everything that's happened, that's it."

"Do you want to talk about it?" She gives me a comforting smile.

"Not right now, do me a favor and tell Z and Riley that dinner is ready."

She got up and I put down 4 plates. I wanted to tell Callie everything, I have no clue what's stopping me.

A few minutes later everyone came in and we were all eating and talking. They were doing most of the talking while I sat and laughed.

"Who wants brownies?" I asked.

"Me!" They all said in unison and started laughing again.

I needed to distract myself. Reading magazines wasn't an option so I'll bake and try not to burn anything down.