Morning Blushes

chapter forty-five

Nakatayo ako sa tapat ng pintuan ng kwarto ko. Nandoon pa rin yung do not disturb sign ko. Pagbukas ko, ganoon pa rin ang ayos ng lahat. Walang ni isang gamit na nagalaw pero nanatili itong malinis. This room has been my fortress and my dungeon. 

Nilapag ko yung phone ko sa table. Under that, I used to hide there. Damn. I missed this place. Even the rooftop. I can't wait to go there. 

"I'll leave your baggage here. I'm afraid that sign won't let me enter," said Navi.

Napalunok ako. "What? Forget it. I'll put that down some other time. Just leave it near the bed."

My heart is moving back to my throat. I don't know how to talk to him anymore. For some reason, I feel like a mimosa shame plant when he's getting near. This is eating me up. 

"Miss, galit ka ba sa'kin?" he asked as he set my luggage aside.

Kumunot ang noo ko at nilingon siya. "No. Why? Why would I get mad? I'm not mad at you."

When I realized I said that too quickly, I took a deep breath. Okay. I am not under attack. 

"I'm not mad at you," I spoke slowly. "Why?"

"Because you left without telling me."

"That was not planned."

He smiled and shook his head instead. "Come here, miss. Your best friend really missed you."

With no second thoughts, I rushed to him and hugged him tightly. He greeted me with a soft chuckle, wrapping his arms around me too. Pero naiinis ako kasi ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko. He might feel it. But, damn. Why am I feeling him so much? 

When I was about to pull myself off, he just hugged me tighter. 

"Wait lang, miss. One minute," he whispered in a hoarse voice.

"I'm not gonna go." I chuckled. 

"No one can tell me when you're coming back," he spoke. "Or if you're coming back again."

"I swear, Kuya Adi just told me yesterday."

"I'm sorry, Avyanna," he mumbled. "I was a coward. I fucked up big time."

"Me too. We both did." I smiled and give him a slight pat on the back. "I like your hair," I told him, slightly touching his hair. "You look better."

Bumitaw siya at napangisi. "My brother woke up."

"When did he wake up?"

"A month ago." He smiled genuinely. "Akala ko magagalit sa'kin. Guess what he did?"

"What?"

"Tinanong ba naman ako kung nasugatan daw ba ako. Damn that angel." He shook his head with a blissful smile on his face.

He's smiling. He's happy. I am glad to see that he is finally glowing again.

"When he got discharged, he came here. Tinawanan pa ako kasi mag-isa lang daw ako dito. We weren't used to the tranquil in this place. So, he brought our dog here."

"You have a dog?" my eyes widened.

He nodded. "Didn't I tell you that? I'll bring you to him after you rest."

"Ah, before you go, I have a question." He's just looking at me and attentively listening. "What happened? Sabi ni Calvin I should ask you instead. Ang saya niyo kanina e. Everyone seems so close."

Once he realized I have nothing left to ask, he cleared his throat.

"It was... not good here when you were away. Magulo. I can't really explain. But I'm glad you weren't here that time."