We Are the Normal Ones: Memoirs of a Fallen Human

PSA

This has really been frustrating me lately. Or the past year or so. But why does everyone excuse people's rude and mean comments toward me and my disorder by telling me that I need to 'understand'? Someone says something to me that completely hurts my feelings. I either defend myself or I just let it sink in. And when I vent to someone, why do they always say "Vloria you need to understand that it's hard for us to deal with people like you" "we don't always understand" or "keep in mind this or that"? Why do I have to battle insecurities, voices, shadows, suicidal thoughts, self-harm tendencies, my past creeping up, lack of sleep, lack of motivation, lack of appetite, physical pain, crying spells, and more AND I have to understand someone who thinks it's okay to say what they want because "they don't understand"? Who says well, "I just don't understand depression" or "we don't always know what to say"? 

Okay, I get it. Even I don't always know what to say to people who have depression either because everyone's different. I may say the wrong things too. However, there's a difference between misspeaking and being rude and nasty. I get it, even the right people say the wrong things. But telling me I need to be understanding of those people who put me down because of my disorder or just make me nothing but my disorder is telling me that you agree with what they say and that I am indeed nothing. 

Guys, I get it. Being my friend is hard. I'm trying so hard to overcompensate for who I am because I get that my disorder makes it hard for you sometimes. But if one more person tells me I need to understand without taking one moment to try to understand me, I'm going to lose it. Telling me that their ignorance is a reason for them to talk down and belittle me is NOT okay. It's not okay for this to happen to anyone with a mental illness. It's already hard enough without all the external pressures from people claiming that they're our friends. So if I or anyone vents to you about them feeling mistreated, please watch what you say. Some things are just messed up to say to someone with a mental illness or even to say to anyone period. Please stop excusing it and putting it all on us.... it's so heavy to bear