Half Hidden // Seungin

T W E L V E

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Lee Felix:

I'm a daredevil, everyone knows that. I love what I do, pulling pranks, causing mischief, and being annoying to my friends. It's the best!

But, there is something about me that I'm not so proud of. I'm afraid of being alone.

Everyone knows this, and we chose not to dwell on it, but it's still a fear of mine.

But I don't know why I'm like that. Maybe because I grew up with a mean dad who left me by myself so much, not caring what happened to me. Maybe it's the fear of something happening when I'm alone.

Whatever it may be, I hate it. 

I always need something of Jeongin's with me if I'm all alone, or when he's not home I have to chill in his room. He makes me feel comfortable, and I do the same for him.

Before I met him, I would have constant freak outs if I were alone for awhile. It sucks a lot.

I usually sleep alone in my own room peacefully, because I have a pillow Jeongin gave me for my birthday the year we met. But, I had brought it into his room while I was chilling in there today, so I didn't have it tonight because I forgot to take it out.

I was able to fall asleep, but in the middle of the night, I shot awake in a panic. I didn't have a nightmare, it was just my senses telling me I was alone.

My breathing was everywhere as I looked around my bedroom. I heard the wind from outside blow the trees and the air condition humming.

I felt like I couldn't breath. I was scared.

I ruffled my hair with my hand, trying to calm down. I looked at the clock and it read 3:00 AM. Three more hours till I wake up for school.

I anxiously lay back down in my bed, still shaking and trying to take in breaths. I tried to force my eyes closed, but it wouldn't happen.

Eventually, I frustratedly got up and walked across the hall to Jeongin's room. I opened the door quietly and he was fast asleep, snuggling against his own pillow.

To my luck, he was on the edge of the bed. It looked like he is close to falling off. But, there was a whole half of the bed open.

I walked over to his bed, making sure I switched around some things on his dresser to confuse him tomorrow morning as I did so.

What? I had to!

Afterwards, without making a sound, I crawled into Jeongin's bed, covering myself with any remaining covers. I instantly felt more relaxed. My breathing calmed down and I shook less.

I felt safe.

Jeongin is a heavy sleeper, so he definitely won't know I'm here till he wakes up. Which is good, because I don't wanna interrupt his sleeping.

I hugged him, snuggling closer to him. And with that, I was able to fall asleep again.