My Step Brothers

Chapter 61. Coping?

I laid there, holding onto my mother. Her heart no longer beating. Her lips no longer smiled at me. Her arms no longer held me. She just lay there on the bed. No longer showering her love on me. My heart was completely broken. The breathe was stolen from me. My life was stolen from me.

Chase picked me up from my mom. He sets me down lightly. He bends down and kisses her cheek. Tears flowed down his cheek. He closes his eyes and reaches for my hand. The tears flow down my face as I hold onto Chase's hand. Alex comes over to my other side. He leans down and kisses my mom's forehead.

Will looks at us. His eyes swollen and his cheeks pink. He shakes his head. "Its time we go home."

Alex and Chase head out the door, I go to follow and Will stops me. He grabs hold of me. He wraps me in a hug so tight. His fingers dig a little in my skin. I look down to my bare feet. I forgot to put shoes on.

"You will always be my family. I will always be here to take care of you. I will be here for you forever. Do you understand? No matter what, you will always have family. My family is your family. You will always have a home. We belong to you and you belong to us." Will says and holds me close. My heart hurts so bad. His words mean alot but I need my mom.

"Come on, I will give you a piggy back ride to the truck. " Will says quietly. I jump onto his back wrapping my arms around him and resting my head against his shoulder. He turned back and with one last look with tears still falling off his face we left the room.

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"The funeral home is coming for her. She planned the whole thing. "

"Why?"

"She knew her time was at an end. The chances of getting a transplant were not good. The list is very long and some people have been on it for years. Her blood type would have to match. There was just so much against it happening that she said it's best to be realistic. We have to talk but we will do it later. Nicky is scared and this is going to be hard on him to understand. He has been calling her mommy since the beginning of summer. I know your hurting but you will help with Nicky too? We can heal as a family. "

"Okay" I say not sure of anything. I kind of stopped thinking. We followed Chase and Alex to the truck. He sets me down in the back seat. Chase sat down next to me. He picked up my hand and started humming while looking out the window.

We get home and Alex pulls out the bed in the couch. Tyler gives me a hug and leaves. I climb onto the bed. My movements feeling very robotic. Chase, Alex, Nicky and Will climb on too. Blankets thrown around. I wrap up in one and Will turns on the television. He turns on Nemo and we all cuddle up together.

Nothing is said. We lay there all crammed in together. Not alot of room to move. But able to feel each other breathing. I layed there with my head on Chase's chest and Alex on the other side of me. Will holding Nicky tight. We are such a broken family. I slowly close my eyes.

I wake up to light shining in and the tainted memories of yesterday. Alex's head on my shoulder and mine still on Chase. Nicky holding onto Chase's arm.

I remember yesterday as Nicky cried as Will tried explaining my mom not coming back. It was so hard and I understand Will being worried about Nicky now.

I get up and see Will on the phone in the kitchen. I go over and sit down at the kitchen table. My hands shaking as I look down. He sets down a glass of Orange juice in front of me. I look at the glass. Im not hungry or thirsty.

"Drink" he says and then goes back to his conversation on the phone. I pick up my glass and take a sip. I set it back down. I look up at Will as he sets down the phone.

"I talked to your grandparents on both sides. I talked to your school. Your excused for the next two weeks. Luckily its thanksgiving break next week so its technically only one week you miss. You need routine and normalcy to get thru this. I have to go see the lawyers to find out if there's anything I need to do. Please just relax and don't cry all day. Time to be strong. Let's get thru this week with family visiting and once everything is settled we can have a sit down and just break down. Okay?"

I look at him and nod. He gets up and leaves. I watch him drive away. I try calling my father. He doesn't answer. I was hoping he would. I start pacing.

My mind starts running. I try calling him from a blocked number. Still no answer. I can't tell if he's ignoring me or if maybe he's at work and doesn't know.

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I go to my room and pack a bag. I get on my iPad and book a flight to buffalo, New York. I leave a note on my bed. It's time for me to see my father. We need to work this out. I lost one parent, maybe It doesn't have to be both of them.

I get in my truck and drive to the airport. I walk slowly into the airport. I'm wearing sweats. I look run over. People are staring at me. I go to the desk and show my id. She looks at me.

"My mom just died. I'm going to see my father. " I say quietly. Her face instantly softens. She no longer looks like she is going to call security. She looks me up and prints my ticket.

"I'm so sorry honey. Do you need anything? "

"No. I just need to go home to my Daddy." I say and pick up my bag. I walk down the hallway to my plane. I put my hands in my pocket and wait in line. I go thru security still getting looks. I don't say anything.

A security guy comes over and asks my name. I give it to him. He tells me that I got bumped to first class and I can get on the plane now. I feel a little relieved. I follow him onto the plane.

I sit down and the stewardess asks if I want anything. She comes back with a pillow and blanket. I lay there with my stuffed puppy from my mom. How am I going to get thru my life with out her? Then I wonder about my dad. I slowly fall asleep.

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