Blame it on me' ~ Post Malone

35.

Rumbling woke me up that morning. I felt something shake and drumming fingers. The first thing I noticed was that Austin's arms were no longer around me. I somehow felt empty. As if something essential was missing. I opened my eyes a little and saw Austin busy with his iPhone. His eyes were tight on the screen, and his face was decorated with a small smile. He was very focused and didn't seem to mind me. I took advantage of it, and I looked at what he was doing. I quickly recognized the Instagram logo. I rolled my eyes. He seemed addicted to Instagram. Whenever he was busy on his iPhone, he was on Instagram. Austin was about uploading a picture and typing a message, so I secretly tried to read.

❤ 💬 ↗️

Liked by tankgod, madisnpiercee, quarrelbilly, joshua_inthahouse, lusttforlife, parisshadows, brendabandana, cassow and 887.348 others

postmalone Waking up after an epic day. Suprised, Madison, I love that girl!

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tankgod 😍😍😍
madisnpiercee 💕💕
quarrelbilly take care of her !❤️ she's special. Limited edition. an actual goddess.
lusttforlife U better treat my QUEEN right! I'll break ur bones if u break her heart! p.s she's a keeper. ;)))
brendabandana She's an angel
username2 my dawggg.
username3 your the luckiest guy in the world, you never wanna let go of this beauty
joshua_inthahouse so cute ! 💗💗 i'm so glad ur happy
username4 @postmalone I wanna be u when I grow up
cassow 🔥🔥🔥
username5 OH MY GOSHH
3 minutes ago

I couldn't restrain myself; I felt melted inside. How cute could he be? As soon as he pushed the upload button, I pulled the iPhone out of his hands and pulled it toward me. Austin faded but let it all happen. His arms closed around my body, and his little smile grew bigger. I settled into his arms, my head against his chest. I listened to his regular heartbeat when I whispered, "That was so sweet." I felt his lips against my hair. "Good morning to you too, spy." "It was about me; I had the right to know." I laughed. "I..." He seemed to doubt, but then he seemed to decide something. "Never mind, it doesn't matter." While he said that, he lay down. I used it to nestle against him, even fiercer, and I felt that I could stay that way forever.

Of course, I should have known that that was impossible with three nosy friends in the area. "Okay, what does Austin do in your bed. Madison?" I heard Kaci shout hyper. "To sleep," Austin replied dryly in my place. I lifted my head and looked at three faces that stared at me. "You are scary, do you know that?" I felt the blood rise to my cheeks. They had to stop grinning like that. I stood against the house wall, outside, watching how the rest held a snowball fight. I didn't feel like participating; my thoughts were somewhere else right now. Despite that fact, my eyes could only see one thing, and that was Austin. He had a blast while he was pelting Joshua like crazy. Kaci helped Austin and Brenda seemed to be on Joshua's side again.

It was already Saturday, and that meant we had a flight back to Los Angeles this evening. That fact made me think a lot. I knew I still had to go somewhere, but I was scared. I didn't want to be confronted. The way it touched me every time. As it always was. The pain and sadness that seemed to attack me then. I wish I could take someone with me, but I didn't dare. Everyone might have known about Riley's death now, but that didn't mean I could share it with anyone. I couldn't let them abandon my pain and sorrow. "Madison!" Brenda stood before me, waving her hand frantically. "Welcome back to earth." Brenda laughed. I was ashamed that I had strayed away in my mind.

"Don't you want to participate?" Brenda's offer was very tempting, but I had decided that I was going now. I'd go to Riley's grave now, so it was over so that I could put the pain aside and be happy again. So that the pain would finally lose, and it would no longer control my life. I had to live normally again; I had to put the pain down. "No, I have to leave." "To where?" Brenda's gaze was curious and worried at the same time. She probably saw the pain in my eyes. "Riley's grave," 

I said before I turned around and walked to the shed.