Blame it on me' ~ Post Malone

41.

Brenda walked downstairs in front of me. I was dressed in my dress and the matching all-stars. But why? I still had no idea about that. The bell rang when I reached the last step of the stairs. It was as if someone had been waiting for that moment. Brenda rushed to the door. "Stay where you are." I was confused, baffled. What was her problem? "Aah, there you are." Brenda's voice was happy and cheerful, and I heard a short, nervous chuckle coming from outside. I looked up and saw Austin. His eyes were already staring at me, full of concern and love. I almost melted away. Brenda pulled me to the door and nearly pushed me against Austin. "Okay, leave. See you later; I want all the details." And then the door was closed. I frowned. "Okay, explanation?" 

Austin didn't seem to have heard me because I didn't get an answer to my question. When I turned around, I knew why. His eyes seemed to inspect my body; they slid from the bottom up. "Can you see it?" I laughed a little awkwardly, and before I knew it, he had pulled me into my arms. His face was only a few centimeters from mine, and I could feel his irregular breath blowing into my face. A strange feeling went through my stomach as he put his hands on my hips. "You look good," he said to my lips, and the immediate occupation of my lips smothered my answer. His hands went down a little, and with a smile, I grabbed them to put them back on my hips. "Don't think so, Post." "You drive me crazy," he whispered while his eyes seemed to be on fire. It made the desire grow in my chest, but I restrained it.

"Where are we going?" "We're going on a date." "On a date? Why?" My curiosity grew by the minute. "That is a question for you and knowledge for me." he teased. "Come." He led me to the car parked on the sidewalk — a white Bugatti. My mouth fell open in surprise. Bugatti? Austin opened my door and even helped me get in because, of course, I couldn't get in alone. That thing was huge. He got into the car quickly and left. There was a soothing silence between the two of us. There was no need for a conversation. The silence said enough; there was love in it. Still, I could not wholly ignore my feeling of a moment ago. I still felt a vague pain that lay on my heart, but now there was medicine. As long as Austin was around, the pain could not prevail, but what if it was gone? I started to feel bad again and shook it off. I stared out the window, on the dark streets. I was attempting to banish my thoughts in the background. I gazed around emotionally.

There were two chairs in the middle of the small gazebo by a small round table. The table was set, and a large white rose lay on the place of the plate. The edges of the fence were covered with small candles that were all lit. The whole thing was complete due to the large rose vine that grew almost everywhere. "Ooh." That was all I got squeezed over my lips. I stared at Austin, and my mouth fell open. "I don't know what to say about this." "Say, yes." His voice contained an enormous amount of love, which also reached his eyes. "Tell me you're going to eat with me." he continued. I nodded briefly and was so emotional that a tear escaped from the corner of my eye. "You are so sweet," I whispered so quietly that it could have been the wind. He did not respond and pulled me by the hand to the table. As I expected, I was put on the chair by the rose. I took it from the plate and smelled it. "Thank you," I said with red cheeks of excitement. "No problem, honey." he laughed.

Austin glanced past me, gazing into the distance. "The food is coming." I turned around, and I saw a man approaching with two plates on his arm with astonishment. "I hope you like spaghetti bolognese." The man put the plate down before me, and I sniffed the delicious spaghetti scent.

***

"Do you want answers to my question?" Austin had been thoughtful and quiet all the time. A feeling began to bubble in me, which didn't mean much, but I still nodded. I stared at my empty plate, too scared to look into his eyes. "Why were you so sad this morning?" I looked at his face — something I should not have done. His faithful eyes were worried and contained pain that reflected my feelings. I didn't want this. I didn't want him to relieve my grief.

It wasn't worth it at all.