X1 imagines {COMPLETED}

Seungyeon-We're Not Happy Pt. 1

Genre : Angst

Song : KARD Trust Me (BM & Somin ver.)

requested by Wannakimi

third person's pov
Seungyeon and Kim knew each other since young and developed feelings for each other when they were teenagers. on his 18th birthday , Seungyeon asked Kim if she could give him the best present ; which was to be his girlfriend.

Kim accepted for sure and they started dating ever since then. 6 years of relationship might sound like they are a really strong couple but things have not been going well lately.

Seungyeon felt like he wasn't a good boyfriend to Kim who has been sacrificing herself so much for Seungyeon it was making him guilty. he felt like he always placed her before him and that made him feel like crap.

he felt like she loved him more than herself.

which was why he brought up the break up issue to her. it has been almost an hour of chatting and the atmosphere isn't pleasant at all.

"we both know our relationship is falling apart. that is why we should stop this. let's stop pretending we're happy." Seungyeon told Kim. "we are happy Seungyeon. are you telling me you're not happy with me?" Kim asked. Seungyeon could see her eyes were teary.

there was something Seungyeon never told Kim. the fact that he read her diary secretly. he knew that diary she kept by her side confined her true feelings and emotions. it was like her punching bag.

'i've known you for a long time. but as we grew up , we became lost souls searching comfort in each other. i can't make you happy anymore.'

that was the only thing he vividly remembers from her diary. the fact that she feels like she's no longer the source of his happiness and felt useless.

"the part you wrote in your diary ; it's not true. you still make me happy. but i feel like you're losing yourself by loving me. and i hate myself for that. that's why i've been cold towards you." Seungyeon said. "you read my diary?" Kim asked.

"i'm sorry i did , but it was the only way for me to find out how you really feel. you just didn't tell me the truth. i needed to find it out myself." Seungyeon said and Kim stayed silent.

"i hope you understand , Kim. when a relationship becomes too toxic , that's when you have to let go." Seungyeon said.

"i only felt happiness when i'm with you. but when i'm alone , i don't know who am i anymore. your smile faded and i felt like i lost myself at the same time." Kim was crying while she talked. "exactly Kim. you're so used to having me next to you , you forget who you are. you have to remember that you're someone you have to love as well. it's not only me myself and i." Seungyeon said.

"but , are we really going to be okay without each other?" Kim cried. Seungyeon went forward and held her hand. "in order for us love , in order for us to find ourselves again , we have to let go of each other." Seungyeon said while looking into her eyes.

"we can take a break and not think about one another for some time. wouldn't that be better?" Kim begged. "no it won't. you'll still have the thinking that i'll be here next to you soon. it's for the best Kim. you'll find happiness ; someone who can love you as much as you love them." Seungyeon stood up and was ready to leave when Kim stood up as well.

"i don't agree to this break up." Kim said. Seungyeon wanted to turn back and hug her but he knew he couldn't. so he continued walking until he felt like he wasn't seen by Kim.

Kim understood how much chance she had with Seungyeon and walked to the nearest park with a heavy heart. people who walked past her gave her quick glances because of how she was crying but she didn't care. her mind was filled with Seungyeon only.

Kim couldn't walk any furthur and walked to the side to squat down. it was just too devastating for her to believe it was over like that. her eyes were filled with tears and sadness. no one can cheer her up now.

Seungyeon on the hand was already back at home , sitting himself in the corner blaming himself for everything. "i'm sorry Kim..i'm just not the one who can make you happy. i don't even know how to love you as much as you love me." Seungyeon mumbled while looking at a photo of Kim in his phone.

Kim had no intention to head home ; her legs were as weak as her heart now. it was dark and late ; where all the danger becomes more dangerous. but all she cared was Seungyeon.

she loved him , but loved too much and lost him in the end.

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A/N : a sad imagine written on my birthday..pft