Fake Love; NamKook

ChApTeR eIgHtEeN

Jungkook

My hands shake anxiously as I watch Namjoon firmly close the bathroom door. Holy shit. Is this really happening? Is he really going to...
I rub my tired eyes now fully awake, my body primed and ready for his touch. A touch I've craved and needed for so long. It's all I've ever wanted—his acknowledgement and affection. His love.
Hesitantly, I glance down at my simple sleep pajamas. I was so tired after leaving work that I quickly showered and passed out without even considering...
The sound of the shower turning on sends a thrill through my body. Should I undress? Would he want to see me naked? Would that be too much? Maybe I should just take my pants off...
God, I'm acting like such a virgin! I'm fucked so many people through the years and yet I've dreamed of this moment since I was in high school. Of course, I've also never been on this side, either, though.
Maybe subconsciously I've been saving myself for this moment with Namjoon. Secretly hoping for another meeting and the day things between us would change.
Clenching my fists on my pants, I take a few deep breaths and try to logically and reasonably relax. Namjoon obviously feels something for me otherwise he wouldn't agree to marry me...or let me fuck him. Right.
The bathroom door swings open startling me and I force out a hard breath. Could I be anymore of a scared loser? This is the man I've wanted for years. Crap, how long have I sat here panicking?!
     He stops toweling his hair to stare at me with concern. Can he see the sweat running down my face and neck? It feels like a tidal wave to me...
     "Hey, what's wrong?" He approaches me, tossing the towel away. "I didn't mean to upset you earlier. Just ignore me—"
     "No, I'm good. I'm fine. Honestly." I smile and feel my body slip back into its relaxed state as I gaze into his eyes. Jeon Jungkook is no scared innocent virgin. I've fucked this man in front of me. The least I can do is return the favor without making an issue of it.
      His intelligent eyes narrow, observing me as if he can read into my very soul, before he leans in and kisses me. It's not rough or rushed. It's soft and sweet. Carrying deep meaning.
     Moaning, I tug him closer to me and we both fall back into the bed. Panic and anxiety long gone and forgotten, I begin hastily stripping myself at the same time trying to get even closer to him.
     His hands roam over my body and the rough touch sends me into overdrive. Nipping his lip, I lay panting and naked under him. His own body bare except for the towel around his waist.
     I pull it then it's gone. Skin on perfect skin. As it should be. A tiny smirk works its way onto his mouth as he takes my lips again, grabbing my legs and jerking me towards the end of the bed. I want this. I want this so fucking much.
     "Have you dreamed of me making love to you, Kookie?" His voice is a hoarse husky whisper in my ear. Shivers run down my spine.
      Licking my lips and tasting him, I nod. "Y-Yes."
     "Mhm." His lips trail slowly over m jugular and down to my chest. "How did I fuck you? I want to make those fantasies into realities."
     I groan with need just remembering all the x-rated dreams I've saved in my mind all these years. So many...so many different ways...
     "I can't...I mean...I c-can't..." I can't think. Can barely speak as he sucks my nipple into his mouth, strong hands gripping my legs and spreading them wide.
     Locking my fingers in his hair, I pull. "I want it rough." I admit, almost embarrassed.
     He looks surprised. "Really?"
     "Y-yeah. I've always wondered what you'd be like out of control. Always so proper and rigid. How that would translate to insurmountable need..." I try to explain.
      He sits up, pondering while admiring my body trapped under him, primed and ready to go. After a moment, he nods. "Be right back."
     I frown as he gets up and leaves the room. Shit. I messed up. How could I be so stup— "What's that?" I mumble, seeing him return with something in his hands.
     A chuckles deviously. "Something to enhance our fun." A wink and he dangles the long golden chain contraption in front of me.
It looks like some kind of harness thing with straps and everything as well as a shiny golden teardrop shape ball at one end. "Umm."
"I made it. For you." He admits, toying with it for a moment. "When I realized it was futile to keep denying this thing between us. When I realized we'd be together like this. I hoped you'd like it."
I take it from him and study it. The cuffs attached to the straps are soft on the inside like fur and silk. The outside metal shiny and sharp.
"I didn't take you for a BDSM guy." I admit, blushing.
He shrugs, taking it back. "It's not really like that. I just thought about how hot you'd look chained to the bed unable to move with this stretching your ass out for me while I tease your body with my mouth." His words are so nonchalant it shocks me.
My eyes are wide as I take in the dark aura around him. He smiles knowingly. "I may have been a virgin but that doesn't mean I don't have likes and wants. Or Needs." He stresses the last word sending chills down my spine.
I crawl up onto my knees and lock my arms around his neck, staring into his eyes. "Let me take care of those needs then. Like you did for me. Use me. Please."
His hand comes up to caress my face. "I don't want to just use you. You know I'm not that kind of person." He pauses, a little frown marring his forehead. "You're a virgin, right?" His hands move around to grope my ass. "Right here. You've never been fucked, right?"
I shakily nod.
He smiles, kissing my cheek. "Well you won't be fucked tonight, either."
I'm about to protest when he presses a finger to my lip.
"Shh. I just mean...I'm not fucking you. I'm making love to you. My way. Do you trust me?"
"Yes." Absolutely no hesitation or doubt mar my voice. Loud and clear. "I trust you, Joonie."
"Good boy." He pushes me back on the bed and holds up the harness. "Let me get you ready for me then. I honestly don't think I can wait much longer, baby."
...baby.....
Tears well up as I realize he called me baby. His baby. His. I'm his. "O-Okay."