Fake Love; NamKook

ChApTeR tWeNtY fOuR

Namjoon

I didn't sleep with Choi. I couldn't do it. I threatened him and he ridiculed me. Eventually he got bored and deleted the photos and videos. I know he's not done playing games but I'll worry about that later.
Right now...right now I need to apologize to Jungkook. If he will even talk to me.
He hasn't returned home in days nor will he answer the phone or social media. He's cut me off completely. It hurts more than I thought it would. I've been waiting, though. Being cut out of his life again sucks. This time is all my fault, though. I deserve this. I really hurt him.
I watched the light drain from his eye as I broke his heart, shattered it to pieces right before my eyes.
I really fucked up.
I've been going to work everyday but I'm told Jungkook is away on business. Is that really true or is he just avoiding me? I don't want to hinder his work.
Hoseok knocks lightly on my office door. "Boss is back. I know you've been waiting." He pauses. "Want to tell me what happened to you two?"
     Jungkook is back at work? A sigh of relief leaves my mouth and I stand up. "Later. I need to see him."
     He grabs my arm when I try to pass, halting me in my steps. A look of concern crosses his serious face. "He's in a meeting right now. Wait until he's finished. We have work to do."
     I frown. "I guess..."
     "He'll be in his office. Let him do his job. He's been absent for almost a week." He reminds me.
      Right. My fault. "Okay. I'll finish the final touches on the project before sending it through to the next phase."
     His sunny smile returns. "Sounds great! I put my trust in your judgment, Namjoon." Patting my shoulder, he walks out.
     I slump in my seat when I'm alone. I'm sure Jungkook doesn't even want to see me but I have to know how he's doing. Does he hate me? Is he hurting?
     Is he...
     Light laughter causes my head to snap up. I nearly trip myself as I peak out of my office to see Jungkook looking glowing in a dark grey suit. His black hair brushed to the side and a smile gracing his lips.
     Beside him, that girl...the Choi girl is clinging to his arm and they are talking. Laughing. What the fuck?
     Hoseok glances at me in a panic as they pass by without glancing my way. It stings. When did this shit happen?     Why is he with her?
     "Namjoon..."
     I glare at Hoseok who flinches. "Do you know something I don't? Why didn't you want me to go see him? Was she his meeting?"
     He takes a deep breath, tugging at his tie in discomfort. "Sorry. I didn't know how to tell you..."
     "Tell me what?"
     "It's all over the company. You've been so cooped up in the office lately you haven't heard but...Jungkook is marrying Choi Soha. They announced the engagement the other day and have been seen together many times since..."
     A large lump forms in my throat. He...certainly moved on fast. He didn't even try to talk to me. He immediately moved on to the girl he was supposedly against marrying in the first place? It makes no sense! Why did he get me involved in the first place then?!
     I clench my fists, grinding my teeth. Resolved and pissed beyond reason, I stalk after the retreating couple, ignoring Hoseok's protests and questions as I plan to hash it out with the brat right now.
     I fucked up. I know that. I messed up and hurt him but for him to do this so easily and fast without even trying to talk to me again...fucking hurts.
     I quicken my pace as their shadows come into view, reaching out and grabbing Jungkook's arm, he jerks to a stop. Soha looks at me curiously as I drag her fake fiancé into an empty office and slam the door closed.
      He avoids eye contact, frowning and crossing his arms in petulant annoyance. "What are you doing, Namjoon? You can't just grab the CEO of your company like that. I have an image."
     I see red and nearly spit fire as I round on him. "What is this about you already being engaged to that woman?"
     He looks at me with disinterest. "You mean Soha?" He shrugs. "Its better this way—for everyone. I should have just gone along with it from the beginning."
    "Why are you doing this? You really want to live your life with a fake love like that? Just for your selfish father?"
     A pained yet still amused smirk appears on his lips. "Fake love? Namjoon...isn't that what this all was from the beginning? You said it yourself. I was the one that let myself get carried away. I was the only one not pretending. I guess after thinking about what you said...having a fake relationship is a lot easier than trying to obtain a real one."
     I'm speechless. "What are you saying?"
     His cold eyes aim right into my soul. "I'm saying...I'm over you. Please let's go back to being strangers. I apologize for disturbing your life in the first place."
     My hands tremble and shake with emotion as I grasp his collar and pull him closer to me. "I was lying! I lied to you, Jungkook. My feelings for you weren't fake, okay? I just said that so you would let me go and do what needed to be done." I huff, panting. "In the end I still couldn't do it, though. I didn't sleep with Choi. I couldn't. I didn't want to hurt you like that."
     "Enough!" He pushes me away from him, straightening his tie. I still catch the shaking of his hands. "This is enough, Kim Namjoon. Just stop."
     "No! You love me, right? You love me and I'm telling you I'm not ending this between us." I say firmly with resolve.
     He just stares at me.
     "I'm not ending our engagement. It's already set with signed contracts. You can't marry her when you are in a business contract with me." Desperation creeping into my voice. 
     I don't want to lose him.
     He opens his mouth but nothing comes out for a long moment. Then he laughs. "A-are you...are you blackmailing me, Namjoon, into staying in a relationship with you? Is this a threat?"
     Disbelief is clear on his face and tone. I'm also taken aback but I don't take it back. "Maybe. It's a promise.You can't be with her—not when you are with me. I'm not ending the engagement. Tell her to leave." I demand.
     His shoulders drop and he looks away from me. "Why are you doing this?" He throws my words back at me. "Why do you care? I figured you'd prefer this, right? I just complicate your life and make it hard. I've given you the perfect out and made arrangements. Why are you fighting it now?"
     Slowly, I walk to stand right before him and cup his face, forcing him to look at me. "Because I love you. Because it's not fake between us. Let's just stop and start over. Please."
     He doesn't respond so I take advantage and lean in, trailing my lips very gentle over his cheek, closing in on his mouth.
     He doesn't reciprocate but also doesn't stop it. I use my tongue to pry his lips open and kiss him. Really kiss him. Showing him the depth of my emotions and passion for him. "It's not fake. I love you. Will you believe me? Will you give me another chance?"
     Swallowing hard, he finally seems to come to his senses and presses me back a bit, staring into my eyes. "I don't know what to believe. You say you never loved me and it was all pretend but now you're telling me that was the lie...I'm confused and don't know how to take you, Joon-Ah." There's pain in his voice.
     I kiss him again, holding him against me when he attempts to struggle. I know he could easily overpower me but he won't. We both know this.
     "Give me a chance to show you which one to believe in. End this joke with Soha."
     He shudders in a breath but I kiss it back out of his lungs. Claiming it. Eventually his arms finally wind around me and he groans, deepening the kiss of his own volition.
      I've made so many mistakes. It's unlike me. I'm only like this with him. I have to try harder. I really don't know when everything between us changed but I'm not letting this second chance opportunity pass by.
     Growing, I push him down onto a nearby desk and aggressively take his mouth, tearing at his suit. I want to feel his skin on my hands.
     He gasps, helping me strip him down to his underwear before kissing again and again with need. I know we still have a lot of issues to work through but right here and now...we need this more. Physical confirmation of our feelings for each other.
     "Joon-Ah." He gasps, moaning in my ear as he's shoved down on the desk onto his back.
     I'm brought back to when I let him take my virginity at work. It was on a desk, too.
    "Kookie...baby...I love you. Let me in." My voice is deep dark and seductive, dripping with need and want. I don't even recognize it.
     He shivers as my breath hits his neck, my teeth nipping here and there as I spread his legs open and slide between them.
     He tugs at my tie. I'm still fully dressed. It makes this seem all the more naughty and obscene. Him naked and vulnerable while I'm dressed and dominating him. I glance at the door which is still unlocked. A small window right in the center where anyone can look in and see what we're up to in here.
     He gulps, seeing the same thing. "L-lock the—"
     I cut him off with a hungry soul stealing kiss. "No. I want everyone to remember that you belong to me and not her. Let them see us."
     He moans again, shuddering as I stroke his cock nice and slow, teasingly rubbing the tip of my cock against his inner thighs. "H-hyung..."
     "Let her see us and know the truth." I whisper, demanding his obedience as lust and jealousy and possession fog my mind and body.
     Remember you who love and always will. See and feel only me.