Take My Hand || Jinson

Happy For A Sec.. What For The Next?

(A/N- Present date is the 27/12/2000, Past date is the 27/10/1999)

⚠️ SUICIDE IS MENTIONED FURTHER IN THIS CHAPTER SO PLEASE BE AWARE⚠️

He was looking outside the window in the clinic. A year has passed and now it was just another boring day inside his "Jail cell" as he liked to call it, watching the raindrops fall and feeling nostalgic. It was raining when he received the news, it was raining at the funeral and since then, it is was raining in his heart...

Bipolar disorder, that phrase, the illness make his life hard as hell, he was always alone and bullied by others, he knew what happiness was, but he never had the chance to experience it...

As Jackson sat there wondering about what life would be like if his best friend had never died, Would he have ended up in this institution? Would he feel as lonely as he does now?, Would he have found someone with whom he would want to spend the rest of his life? Many questions flooded into Jackson's head as he thought about the outcomes that could have been if that one thing didn't happen.

~ Flash Back ~

⚠️ Just another Suicide warning⚠️

When all was dark and there was no hope left Jooheon came to his aid on the 27/11/1999. Jooheon was an extrovert and nice person who met Jackson at the park and since then they became friends. In the beginning, Jackson didn't accept him and he was always trying to push him away, but Jooheon persist, he only wanted to help him and at the end, Jackson accept him.

As time passed and Jooheon was worried about Jackson, he knew Jackson was suffering because of his bipolar disorder but he wasn't doing anything to overcome or at least treat it, so he asked him to search for help, to enter to a clinic, but Jackson was persistent when it came to him saying no, to Jackson finding help was a waste of time and money and was unnecessary.

But what Jackson was unaware of was that his best friend was silently suffering. Jackson was so focused on how close he and Jooheon were he never actually realized how much the other had suffered as he tried to help Jackson. Jooheon himself was going through something similar to Jackson only he wasn't as obvious as the older was.

Jooheon wore long sleeves and over sized sweatshirts on a daily basis. Everyone thought it was just his choice of style but no one really knew. The multiple scars, red in color, spread across his skin. Although Jooheon thought they were beautiful it was socially unacceptable, therefore he had to hide each and every one. His arms, thighs and stomach all littered with the crimson lines.

One day Jooheon took a little more onto his shoulders than anticipated; Having to deal with Jackson and his constant needs as well as all that was happening at home (Parents going to separate, Father being abusive, etc.) he had finally had enough. Walking into the bathroom to the loose tile in the wall which held his "Best friend" and pulled the object out of it's hiding spot. The familiar feeling of cool metal in his hand. Taking a seat on the edge of the bathtub he takes a deep breath.

The metallic smell of blood wafting through the air. The all too familiar stinging sensation coursing through his veins. Line after line, blood dripping on the floor, the feeling becoming all to addictive making him crave more than he already was. Without thinking he pushed the blade slightly harder breaking open an actual vein. The blood rushed out but he continued to slice open his wrist. Soon Jooheon felt limp, falling to the floor as the darkness consumed him.

That was how Jackson found his best friend. Next to the limp body a note sat which Jackson quickly picked up.

"Jacks, I'm sorry but please know I had my reasons. I hope you fulfill my dying wish and get help. I have a bank account in your name and it is for you to get the help you need. Find someone who wants to stay by your side please! ~ Jooheon."

~ End of Flash Back ~

That was just under a year ago and Jackson had fulfilled his best friends dying wish with a heavy heart full of guilt and had gotten help. He has now been in JYP Health Institution for nearly a year and today Jackson felt even lonelier than usual.

That was when he saw a nicely polished black car, definitely someone rich pull up and someone step out. The male wearing a blank expression although what else do you expect when people come her. It isn't a very happy or nice place to be. Jackson sat there pondering "Maybe he will be my friend" He says to himself quietly, thankfully he didn't have a roommate at the moment. He look out the window once more before getting up and laying himself down on the bed, pulling the blankets up to his nose before letting the thick layers encase him in warmth, slowly closing his eyes. Jackson fell asleep that night in hopes of a new friend or two the following day, but that's it isn't it, they are only just hopes.

As Jackson slept he dreamed of five other people he would like to befriend, but the question is how was he going to do that. He can't do anything right now, it is 12.00 am and no one else would be awake so Jackson decided to wait till morning then he could ask the clinical nurses for some information on the other males.