We Met On The Road To Recovery

30.

Shawn Mendes
"You can't be together you know that don't you"
"I don't understand"
"I'll say it again, you can't be together" Andrew said as we sat in a green room, getting ready for my interview.
"No I heard you. I said I don't understand and I still don't understand where this is coming from" I argued as I watched Andrew get more and more frustrated.
"Look. After this whole revelation about her father and her past it's just not good for you. Your image with Camila boosted our ratings. Now with the break up they've dipped" he explained and I groaned with frustration as he spoke.

"Not everything has to be for ratings or image! What about my feelings? Do they not matter in terms of your precious ratings? Huh? Because I'm pretty sure that my fans would care more about my happiness and feelings rather than fucking ratings" I said not bothering to look at him.
"While you've been hanging out with Camila over this past week our ratings are creeping up again and you can't say that you're not happy hanging out with her. Best of both worlds" Andrew said and I groaned.
"I don't want to be with her"
"Well you can't be with Faith either. I'm putting my foot down and so is the PR team" he said standing up.
"You control what I do only so far. I'm a grown man. You don't get to decide who I'm with or where I go. Remember that"
"I only want what's going to be best for you in the long run. Remember that" he said before walking out of the room.

I looked at myself in the mirror before I had to go out to interview.
I looked messier than I would have liked.
I could see that I looked drained and tired and that wasn't the image I wanted to put out to the fans, even though I know they'd be supportive.
But I had to grit my teeth and get on with it.
And so that's exactly what I did.

"Shawn it's great to have you here today" the woman said as I sat beside her.
"It's lovely to be here" I smiled.
She asked me a lot of questions about anything and everything.
Questions about my childhood and my family, about the music I was creating and what my future plans were. It was nice to be asked questions like that without a constant focus on my relationship status. But I knew it would come in eventually.
"So after seeing multiple photos of you and Miss Cabello out together, are we right to assume that you two are back on?" She asked and I shook my head lightly.
"No I'm sorry. We're not back on. We're such good friends and I love her but we're nothing more than friends for the time being" I said and nodded as I spoke.
I quickly looked towards Andrew who shook his head as he looked at his phone.
"For the time being? So there's a tiny bit of hope there?" She smiled and just to keep Andrew happy I replied positively.
"You can never say never" I smiled.
"Thank goodness there's hope. Does that mean that your old fling Miss Elizabeth is no longer in the picture?" She asked and a tick of annoyance appeared in my head.
"She wasn't just a fling I really did love her and have feelings for her." I said, " but you know, the sad thing is for us celebrities, we rarely get to choose who we want to genuinely be with. We're always pushed towards being with someone we don't really want to be with. And that's the sad truth about it"  I said and the interviewer smiled sadly at me while giving a little nod of her head.
"Well, thank you for your time today Shawn" she said and I nodded.
"It's been a pleasure" I smiled.

I didn't regret anything that I said.
I knew someone would have an issue with what I had said but all I could do was hope that my fans where behind me and that if Faith was watching, she'd get the hint that I truly want to be with her.