A Letter To Him .

second chances .

it was better this time . i didn't stutter , okay maybe once or twice . i was not nervous , maybe just a little . yea , my face was heated but i've grown accustomed to that . whenever you're around , it happens and i just had to get used to that .
well we walked and talked , we laughed and i stared . you eyes look nicer than mine , same colour , different perceptions . it has a sparkle in it  , it has life . you said my eyes looked full of wonder , well it was but not in the sense that you meant . my eyes were full of wonder , filled with questions . i wondered what you were thinking . i wondered what you were feeling .
but i kept my questions to myself and savoured every moment with you .
then you met my mom . i promise it was a coincidence , i had not planned it . i introduced you to her as a student teacher . i swear i could've died right there , especially when she had assumed that you were my boyfriend . you seemed okay though , but i wouldn't really know how you were feeling . you better at hiding your feelings than i am . when i got home i reevaluated what my mom said . boyfriend ? that sounds so temporary , so less , so nothing . i'd prefer to call you my soulmate , my forever  , because even apart we would be together , during life and even in death . don't ever doubt my love , don't ever think that you're not on my mind , don't ever think that i could replace you , because i've realised that you most probably find your soulmate once in your entire lifetime . no , this is not another teenage girl spouting idyllic concepts . i've reviewed this from a logical point of view . since the day i met you , i felt the aftereffects of you . and even now , i still do . you're irreplaceable to me . you're EVERYTHING , and i mean that in the most honest way possible .
let me reminisce about the day we walked together , let it flow like a loop in my head , till next time .
my dreams inserting itself into reality ? definitely .