twenty-two: apologies

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twenty-two: apologies

For the last two days, I've been ignoring Aden. On purpose.

After our argument, I made him leave my room and let me sleep. Yesterday, I proceeded with my day and did all of the Luna things everyone asked me to do. If it required Aden and me, I directed everyone to Aden. I knew that the pack knew of our little fight, I could feel the tension. Last night, I heard howling outside my window. I knew it was Aden. I wasn't ready to forgive him that easily.

But today, he seemed to pester me even more than yesterday. Between the gifts and the random snacks, it's neverending.

"You need to forgive him," Belle sighed, throwing a punch at me.

"No, he needs to learn," I shouted, trying to kick her leg.

"But he's- No, you're leaving your face open. If you turn your arms like this, then you'll cover your face and your chest," Belle instructed. This morning, Belle suggested that I spar with her instead of the young wolves. "As I was saying, he's hurting because he's away from you."

"Good," I huffed, bouncing around her. "Let him hurt."

Belle quickly grabbed my arm and spun me around, trapping me in a headlock, "No, C, it's not like that. It's the mate bond-"

"The stupid mate bond. Ugh," I groaned, tapping out. Belle let go of me and walked over to the counter, throwing me a water bottle.

"No, I'm serious. You don't feel it? You don't feel empty and lonely. You haven't spoken to him in almost two days, Char," Belle asked.

"I've always felt empty," I chugged the bottle.

"You know what I mean, Lottie. I know you feel it. The whole pack feels it," Belle stated.

My head snapped up at her confession, "what?"

"I'm not trying to bait you, C. I'm being serious. You are a mother figure to these people. They look up to you. If you're hurting, they're hurting, too, even if you don't know it. Why do you think you can feel what they feel sometimes? You're connected," Belle informs me.

"I- I didn't- I'm sorry, I really didn't know," I whispered. Why do I always mess up?

"You need to stop letting your fear of getting hurt, ruin your happiness. I get it, Aden was really mean and may have gone a little too far, but other people, with actual bad intentions, will use your weaknesses against, especially in this world. You need to realize that although Aden fucked up, he's actually sorry. And, from what I heard, for him to apologize, it's a huge deal. He hasn't always been this nice," Belle lectures.

I let Belle's words invade my thoughts. Not only am I hurting, but I'm also hurting the people I'm supposed to keep safe; without even trying. I didn't mean to, I'm just upset with Aden. All because of the stupid training session. "Belle, where-"

"He's at the training field, or actually should be leaving for their-" I ran out the door, not listening to what Belle was saying.

Making a b-line to the training field, I run past all of the workers and wolves, ignoring their calls. I am a woman on a mission and won't let anyone stop me, not even- my mother? My head snaps over to the treeline where I swore I saw my mother. The area was empty, no one was around.

I turned my attention back to where I was running, only to run into someone. Before I could hit the ground, they wrapped their arm around my waist. "Where are you going so fast?" they call.

I was so focused on the fact that I hadn't hit the ground, that I didn't catch the wonderful smell of burnt wood and grass. "Oh, uh, hi," I breathed.

"Hey, sweet pea," Aden smiles.

"I, uh, I'm sorry I hurt you," I whisper.

"No, you didn't hurt me. You don't need to apologize," he lifts my chin up, making me look into his captivating eyes.

"Belle told me that being away from me is hurting you, especially since I refused to talk to you. I didn't mean to hurt you, I just didn't want to talk to you because I was upset," I confess.

"Well, I'm more sorry," he teased. I smiled softly and place my hand on his face, "I just let my insecurities get the best of me, I'm truly sorry."

"Babe, there's nothing you could ever do that would make me want you to apologize. Please stop apologizing for having a perfectly human reaction. I'm the sorry one. But no matter what, I'm here for you, always. I'll love you nonetheless, don't you forget," he smiles.

At his words, my heart stops beating and the world stops. The words came so naturally out of his mouth, if I wasn't paying attention, I wouldn't have caught it. He didn't seem to notice his slip. Someone calls him over from a distance and he quickly kissed me, "I'll see you later. I got to go do something."

I nodded in a daze and stood there dumbstruck. This kiss felt different. My lips burned at the quick contact, along with my cheeks. My hands flew to my lips to make sure they were still there. The sensation of his affection left them feeling numb. I smiled at the sound of his voice and the feel of his touch.

He loves me. He may have accidentally said it, but it's there. In his heart, he loves me. My felt my heart grow three times it size and I sighed happily. I felt like I was floating.

He loves me and for once in my life, I was sure of myself.

"I think I love you, too."

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