The New Addition L.S

Ch.41

Harry

I walk into my room and lock my door.
I immediately fall into my pillows sobbing. It's hurts so bad I just can't do it anymore.
I was way too sober but there isn't a way I can fix that.
I get up and wipe my tears.
I walk over to my dresser and see a picture of Gemma.
It was from her graduation she was so happy.
She would be so happy and successful right now. I just wish she was here with me.
I clench the picture frame sobbing and chuck it at the wall. The glass shatters every where.
"HAZ!" Liam yells banging on my door.
"Leave me alone." I growl.
"Haz what was that?!" Lou yelled.
"I just dropped something okay!? Can you just fucking leave me alone." I yell.
"Just please don't do anything stupid." I hear Louis say.
He wants stupid fine.
When I hear them walk away I continue sobbing.
It felt good to break that frame.
I walk over to my lamp and throw it at the wall shattering all over.
I continue sobbing and throwing everything.
I hear them at the door again but there isn't anything else to throw.
I fall to my knees in the floor sobbing with glass all around me.

Just one.
I have to. I need to take the pain away so bad.

I grab a piece of glass and bring it to my wrist.
I slide it across it feeling relief but still sobbing at the same time.
I do it a lot more until my arm is numb.
I take a shirt and wipe the blood.

I can't do this.
I can't breathe. I began hyperventilating and sobbing.
I hear them yelling my name.
"I-I can't breathe" I sob.
They can probably here me seeing as their yelling gets louder.
"HAZ OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!" Niall screams.
But I can't hear them.
I can't breathe and it's just getting worse.
"P-Please help me!" I sob still unable to breathe.
Then all of a sudden the door is slammed open and they all run to me.
My body is just in a ball sobbing pulling my hair.
"Baby shh it's okay what happened." Louis coos.
I don't say anything I can't even breathe.
I collapse in his arms.
"C-Can't breathe!" I choke.
My throat his closing.
"INHALER NOW!" Liam yells to Niall.
They quickly out it against my mouth and I suck in the medicine.
Instantly feeling relief.
"Baby what happened?" Louis asked.
I sit up from his arms and sit back against the wall with everyone sitting around me.
I wipe away my tears, my face burning and eyes puffy.
"I-I'm sorry Lou I tried so hard I just couldn't stop once I started." I sob.
"Shh babe what are you talking about?" He asks.
I reveal my wrist to them sobbing.
It looks horrible.
All bloody and cuts everywhere.
They all went pale one I showed them so I instantly hid it again.
"I'm so sorry!" I sob.
"It's okay Haz c'mere." He says and pulls me into his chest.
"No offense haz but it looks like a tornado happened in here." Niall says.
"Niall!" Liam yells punching him.
I just ignore him and pick of the graduation picture that's next to me.
I look at it letting tears stream down my face.
I sit up again sitting criss cross and put the picture down.
I stare at all the glass on the floor surrounding me.
I pick up a piece and admire it.
"Haz put that down." Liam said.
I look up at him with puffy eyes clenching the piece in my hand feeling it break through my skin. They probably notice that since there is blood coming out of the palm of my hand into the floor.
"Harry! put it down!" Louis yells.
He tried to grab it but I move away and quickly stand up.
"P-Please just let me!" I sob.
"Harry seriously put it down!" Zayn yelled and they all stand up.
"N-No I just c-can't do this anymore let m-me!" I sob.
Then out of no where Niall charged towards me.
But I push him back.
And back away but I feel someone grab me and pry the glass out of my hand.
"NO! PLEASE DONT GIVE IT TO ME!" I yell sobbing.
"GET HIM OUT OF HERE!" I here Liam yell.
I feel Louis and Zayn pull me out and bring me to Louis room.
I try to push them off but they are too strong.
"PLEASE LET ME GO! I WANT TO BE WITH HER!" I scream sobbing.
Niall and Liam are just in the room next to me so they definitely are hearing me scream.
"No Harry stop!" Louis yells and I can hear him slightly sobbing as I try to fight out of his grip.
"JUST PLEASE LET ME DIE." I scream sobbing and fall in to the floor.
I notice both of there faces went pale.
"I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die." I say over and over sobbing.
"Harry! Snap out of it!" Niall yells I didn't even know he was in here.
"I-I can't do this." I sob.
"Yes you can baby it's okay." Louis coos holding me on the floor.
"N-No I can't I need to be with her she's all alone." I sob in his chest.
Eventually I just keep crying until I just pass out.

I'm so sorry this was so sad.
Poor Harry. I swear it gets happier.