Hamilsquad Oneshots

Rant on Historical Jeffershit

Just kind of a weird biography/rant. Idek. Kind of all over the place. And I wanna write Jeffmads at some point, but for now, thoughts in italics.

Third person?

Jefferson was born into everything he had and was a rich spoiled brat. (In the authors opinion)

It was a cloudy day in Virginia. None other than the Thomas Jefferson thought
I should have a killer Shetland Ram
So he was looking to buy a Shetland Ram. He went to the person selling Shetland Rams, who was not too far from Monticello.

"Do you have any strangely smart ones that I could teach to do tricks?"

"Uh yeah, actually. That one over there." The man pointed to a Ram with longer horns, and darker wool than the others. "He is kind of a weird one."

"How much?"

"20 dollars" (I think that's 200 modern day)

Jefferson handed the man selling rams the money even though the man started insisting he didn't want the money (*cough* 21 Chump Street *cough*) and took his new smart ram home. When he got home, he spent about an hour a day teaching the Shetland Ram to be violent. The Ram ended up hurting someone passing by Monticello within a few weeks of the buying of it. In total, the Shetland Ram hurt twelve and killed one little boy, and also broke a fence according to a newspaper from then.

One day, Jeffersh- *cough* umm Jefferson, fell in love with a girl named Martha. She ended up dying. He went to France as ambassador, to cope with Martha's death because he became depressed, even though Hamilton was better at French than him. (Ron Chernow said that Hamilton was better at French than Jefferson K? K.)

One night in November he felt sick, so he called out for his daughter.

"Please, send your nurse in. I fear I am ill and should get a diagnosis for something."

She sent in her nurse, Sally Hemmings, and Jefferson got better quickly thanks to her, no doubt, but afterword he stayed close with Sally. In the next few years, while Sally was about 13 when she gave birth to one of Jeffershits children. She had 3 more of his children. One of their descendents is alive and they changed their last name to Jefferson after doing a DNA test, proving it.

Jefferson did not want anyone to know these kids were his children and he had them with a slave. He also helped Sally's two brothers acheive freedom. (they were slaves)

During Jefferson's time in France, he started doing French things. He tried macaroni & cheese, ice cream, and got high (so maybe weed or something like that. {The author doesn't know drugs very well, only from fan fictions, and is scared that the FBI would show up if she googled it cause her bff and her text about murder a lot...}) So when he came back to America, he came with a snack preference ahead of his time, and enjoyed the disgust of others as he would eat Mac & cheese at cabinet meetings. He was eventually told by Washington that he had to stop eating at cabinet meetings and Washington banned snacks completely. The 6'2" man was very... interesting?

He became friends with John Adams until the election between them. That's when Adams published that Jefferson was dead, so Jefferson published that Adams wanted to go to war with France. Around 10 years later they became friends again. And Jefferson apparently died a few hours before him on July 4th, aka on the 50 anniversary of our country. And then someone out there celebrated. And we now also celebrate the death of Hamilton's enemies.

Aaand let's not forget when he came back to America he didn't bother to keep up with French politics but was also like fit should be a quiet year" for them. Like jsbdjwnwnwjnssn who gave him the right-

Not to mention he was a total coward. He would always run in the face of danger and it may be because he had anxiety like I've read that all the founding fathers probably had some sort of mental illness sooooo idk. John Adams once said he never heard Jefferson utter more than three sentences together.

754 words

I'll add more as I learn more. Also I was thinking the next one to be a Jamilton, Mullette, or Lams. Which do y'all prefer or like best? Next one will include smut (in the pt.2.) Well, have a nice day/night!