Saturday, April 10, 2021
Shawn Carter's Residence
Atlanta, Georgia
8:30 amBeyoncé woke up in bed alone. She looked over to Jay's side of the bed and saw that it hadn't been slept on.
She sighed as she got out of the bed and went downstairs. She wanted to find Jay talk to him about last night. She felt bad about walking away from him and going to bed angry.
She definitely had a hard time sleeping without him, and she thought all night about how she could possibly make things right.
Beyoncé walked downstairs, and she could hear Jay making noise in the kitchen.
"Good morning," she said to him as she entered the kitchen.
"Hey," he said as she sat down at the kitchen counter.
There was an awkward silence that filled the room for a minute or so until Jay spoke up.
"You want breakfast?" he asked as he looked in the fridge.
"No, I'm good," she told him.
"Cool," Jay said as she looked at him.
He looked tired as well, and it was quite evident that he didn't sleep much the night before either. He stayed up half the night trying to think of what to do next about their relationship.
"Shawn, I'm sorry," Beyoncé apologized.
"For?" he asked her as he folded his arms, leaned on the kitchen counter, and looked at her.
"For the entire argument last night. I'm just really sorry for all of it. For not listening, for walking out. I just got really defensive and really stupid, and I was doing too much. You have every right to be upset with me. This is obviously a situation that can't be solved by us arguing and yelling at each other," she continued.
"I'm sorry too ma for all the yelling and not listening to you either. I get where you're coming from. You made plans for your life before we got together, and I get that," Jay told her.
"I know that you're in a different place than me, and you're thinking about setting down and kids, and I'm honored that I'm the woman you want to do that with, but I've just never really wanted kids. I should've told you that sooner. Don't get me wrong. I like kids, and I love my nephew, but I also love that I can give him back to Tyra when I want to. And I know that that's selfish, but it's the way I feel. I just really want to focus on college and my career and not taking care of a child, not being a mother. I want to focus on graduating college, then med school, and then getting a job. And I watched how Tyra struggled after she had York. It took her a while to get back on her feet. She had health problems, and her body was just completely different. I know it's really selfish. I know, but I just don't want that. I love our relationship now, and I don't want it to change," she told Jay.
"Is that really what you want?" he asked her.
"That's what I want now, and that's what I see myself wanting in the future," she replied.
"Then I guess I can try to be okay with that, with not having kids. I love you Bey, and I don't want to be without you," Jay told her.
"Babe, I-," Beyoncé said before her phone started ringing.
She grabbed her phone to see that her mother was calling her. She answered it before putting it to her ear.
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