Child of War

Doubts

I patted my hair dry with a soft towel before weaving the thick dark strands into a long complex braid. I couldn't seem to get over how great it felt to shower. I tried to bathe in the sea on Lah'mu a couple of times, but, without soap, the salt just tangled my hair and made it feel gross.

I walked through the towering halls of the now all too familiar Jedi Temple, the Sun just rising over the sprawling cities of Coruscant. I sat at one of the windows, curled up on the window sill, to watch the sunrise paint the sky orange, red, and pink.

I took a deep breath. The mornings were always so peaceful. The halls were empty because I woke up before anyone else. I couldn't sleep. Too many nightmares. But, aside from that, the temple was starting to feel like home.
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I took a deep breath as the box lifted off the ground. I was getting better. As time went on, I learned to ignore all the fear, all the doubt. This was where I belonged.

The box floated up to the ceiling then slowly descended to the floor once again.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

Master Yoda tapped his cane against the floor. "Good. Very good."

When my session was done, I left, excited to tell Alana the good news. I searched everywhere, but I couldn't find her. Eventually, I ended up in the training center for the younglings still learning to handle a lightsaber.
I though back to all the conversations we'd had there over the past five months as I walked between the rows of benches.

I stopped when I noticed a small object under the leg of one of the seats. I slipped the disk out and held it up. I pressed a tiny button on the edge of the slim device.

Suddenly, a hologram flashed out of the device.
Alana straightened up from a crouch and looked at nothing in particular. "Hey Lianna. I'm sorry to have to tell you like this, but... I couldn't do it face-to-face. I know how much trouble you've been having fitting in. I couldn't bear to see your face when I told you that your only friend is leaving."

I almost dropped the message.

"It's not your fault. To be honest, you're the only reason I stayed for as long as I did. We all need a friend, but... I just couldn't anymore.

"The Jedi are supposed to be peace keepers, but ever since this war started we've been acting like soldiers. That's not the cause I supported. It's not the Jedi Order I came to love. Maybe some day, when all this fighting stops, I'll come back. Maybe the Jedi can come back from this, but for now." She sighed. "I really hate to do this to you, but I can't take it anymore. I'm sorry. Hopefully, you can forgive me. Hopefully, I'll see you again, but if I don't... thank you for being my friend. Goodbye Lianna." The message clicked off.

I stood there in shock. Alana had left the Jedi Order. My only friend was gone.