Life After Lies

FORTY SEVEN: STILL

Like what Ate Adeline's said, after a week ay in-enroll nila ko at nag hire sila ng magagaling na professors para sakin. Oh well, Rios' power. Tinanggihan ko pero talagang mapilit sila, lalo na si atehis

"I told you to stay in our house," she said while pouting. Nilingon ko sya habang nag titimpla ng gatas para kay Bastien.

"I will, just give me time. Who knows, maybe tomorrow I'll crash in here," I chuckled. Ilang beses na nya akong kinukulit tungkol sa pag lipat ko sa kanila. Ayaw ni Tita dahil mas matututukan nya raw ako, siguro ay kailangan kong hatiin ang katawan ko para tig isa sila.

"Probably next week when my class starts," seryosong sambit ko habang nag titimpla pa rin ng gatas ni Bastien. Ayaw nya sanang ako na ang gumawa nito pero mapalit ako, I need to practice this one. Hindi naman pwedeng breastfeed lang kapag nag ka-anak na ko since kailangan ko rin mag trabaho soon.

"Next week alright. Carter and his brother will arrive next week too," paninigurado nya. Carter is her husband at sa Pilipinas nag ta-trabaho but half Chinese raw. Their blood mixed and as a result, ayan si Bastein. Not bad, huh. Bastien's so cute at feeling ko ay marami itong mapapaiyak pag nag binata. I gave him the milk that I made. He smiled and kissed me on my cheeks bago lumapit sa Mama nya.

"I will introduce you to my husband and his brother next week, so better pack your things before that day"

I nodded and seated beside them. Kinuha ko si Bastien sa bisig ni Ate at binuhat ito habang umiinom ng gatas nyang nasa nursing bottle. "Is it really fine to live in your roof, Ate?"

"Of course! Don't think like you're aren't belong to the family. Carter will surely understand since I kinda told him about you," she answered. Nakakahiya talaga. Pero malaki naman ang bahay nila Ate kaya siguro naman ay di nakakahiya sa asawa nya.

"If you're thinking about Carter and his brother, don't worry they will fly back to the Philippines after to manage their own school," paliwanag nya. Nagulat naman ako sa sinabi nya. They own a school? Just like Deffi's family. "They will attend some sort of meeting here with Papa. Actually, his brother is just I think a year older than you"

"Really? And he's into business, nice," tipid na sagot ko.

She chuckled and looked at me maliciously. "You will like him for sure. I saw him many times and he's handsome!"

Natawa na lang ako at umiling. Wala pa sa isip ko ang mga ganong bagay sa ngayon. No time for that, masyado akong maraming kailangang intindihin.

"You know what, sis? It's hard to raise a child alone, though we're here but I'm sure, your baby will look for a father," she said as a matter-of-fact.

Sumagi na rin sa isip ko yan kaya lang ano naman ang magagawa ko. "I don't know but I'll try my best to be both. I will never let my child feel the incompleteness"

She leaned on my shoulder and whispered. "Well, it's too early for that though. We'll see what will happen in the future"

Napaisip din ako, paano nga kaya kapag nag hanap ng tatay ang anak ko? Paano kung hindi ko kayaning palakihin sya mag isa? "Do you think, I have to tell this to C-Cleo?"

"You mean, the father?" she asked and I just nodded.

"Yes, you have to. He's not just your ex, but the father of your baby"

Right, kailangan kong sabihin pero hindi ko alam kung kailan at kung paano. "What if, he's n-now happy with someone else?"

Hindi maiiwasang mahulog sya sa iba. Knowing Cleo, masyado syang mabait sa iba. Hindi na dapat ako mag taka kung sa mga oras na ito ay masaya na sya sa iba.

"You'll just tell him about the baby. It's between him and the baby, unless you still have feelings for him," tiningnan nya ko nang may pag dududa. I shook my head slowly. Wala na, wala na siguro. Wala na sana. "Don't cage your self. If you still love him then tell him or you'll regret it"

I can't tell him, hindi pa ako handa. Unti-unti na rin kong nasasanay na wala sya kaya para saan pa. "Yes, I love him, still. But I don't want him back, at least not now"

"What's the point of running from him then?" she asked an raised her eyebrow. Ano nga ba? Hindi ko alam kung bakit pilit akong lumalayo sa kanya. Basta ang alam ko, sanay na ako ng wala sya.

"We only want what makes you happy, Frances. If running and avoiding him is your happiness then I will support you," malambing nyang sabi at humilig ulit sakin.

I force to smile at her and gently hugged this little Bastien on my arms. I know, ang gulo ng isip ko. Ayoko syang mapunta sa iba pero ayoko syang balikan. Dahil sa ngayon ay wala sya sa mga plano ko.