Dean X Reader Imagines

I never was (Dean X Reader)

Dean and I have been together for a few years now but things became a bit complicated after his mom came back. We didn't know if we should tell her or let her get settled first. But Dean said that it was better if she had the whole picture of what is going on in order to get used to it.

It was an awkward conversation -at least for me- but she seemed fine with it. I still don't know how to act when she and Dean are in the same room. I mean she just met her sons again and I don't want to make it uncomfortable for her.

Tonight, the boys and I just returned from a successfully done case and sat down to celebrate. We took a few beers and sat on the map table. I was sitting on Dean's lap and Sam was sitting next to us.

We hear the door open and we see Mary. Immediately I jump off Dean's lap and I sit on the chair next to him. "Are you ever going to get over this?" Dean asks
"No" I say and he chuckles.

"Can we talk? I have to say something to you" Mary says refering to the boys
"I'm gonna go for a quick shower and then crash because I'm tired" I say as I get up
"Goodnight" Dean says and pecks my lips "I'm gonna join you later" he continues
"Ok. Goodnight" I say to everyone and I go inside. I take some clothes and I go in the bathroom. But I notice that my conditioner is missing AGAIN. Sammy... Next time I better buy two bottles. But walking to the other bathroom that was closer to Sam's room, I overheard their conversation.

"I'm doing this for you. I'm playing three decades of catch up here" Mary says
"And we are not?" Dean asks "How do you think this have been for us. We are your sons and you've gone. Our whole lives you've been gone" he continues raising his voice. "You said you needed time. You said you needed space so we gave you your space. But you didn't need just space. You needed space from us".
"That's not true. Dean, I'm trying--" Mary says but Dean interrupts her
"How about for once you just try to be a mom?" he asks. I can hear the hurt in his voice and it is killing me.

"I am your mother but I am not just a mom. And you are not a child" Mary says
"I never was" Dean says. That hurt me more than anything. And the worst part is that I agreed with him. He was never a child. A tear escapes from my eye and rolls down my cheek. "So between us and them--"
"It's not like that" she says
"Yeah Mary it is" he says. Mary? "And made your choice. So there is the door" he says and I hear him walk away from the table. I wipe my tears and I take a deep breath. I turn around and I go back to the room.

Dean had already gotten in, storming the door behind him. I open the door slowly and I see him sitting on the bed. "Everything ok?" I ask
"Yeah. Are you done with the shower?" he asks but it's obvious that everything is not ok.
"I didn't get in yet. You can take my turn if you want" I say
"No, you go. I'm gonna wait" he says
"No, go. I'm gonna take my things and go to the other bathroom" I say. He nods and then buries his face in his hands. I walk to the bed and I sit next to him. "What's wrong?" I ask softly rubbing his back
"Nothing" he says and gets up. "I'll see you later" he says and leaves the room.

What could Mary possibly do to make him be so angry at her that he said those things and be so hurt now?

He comes back carrying the clothes that I had left earlier in the bathroom. "These are yours" he says and hands them to me
"Thanks" I say and I get up from the bed. He tried to pretend like he is fine but he is not. He is hurt. I can see that through his fake smile. He leaves again and then I hear the bathroom's door lock.
______________

I go back to the room after my shower and I meet with a shirtless Dean. His hair was wet and he was wearing only a pair of black sweatpants. I stand there for a bit and I look at him. "You ok?" Dean asks as he notices me. He smiles and puts his t-shirt on. "Yeah" I say and I walk to the bed. I sit on my side and I lay my back on the headboard. I put my hair up on a messy bun as Dean sits next to me on the bed. He comes closer to me and kisses my exposed neck. "No, no. We are going to talk first" I say
"Talk about what?" he asks
"Come on Dean. You are not ok" I say
"What are you talking about? I'm fine" he says. I put my hand on his cheek
"No baby. What did your mom tell you?" I ask
"Don't worry, I'm gonna get over it. I promise" he says and kisses my cheek. He lays down and turns his back on me.

I lay down too and I try to sleep. But I can't stop thinking about Dean. What did Mary do? About an hour later Dean gets up from the bed, changes quickly and leaves. He is probably going to a bar so I didn't stop him. Maybe a drink or two will make him feel a bit better.

But when he returned, I realized that he had more than a drink or two. He opened the door to our room and slams it close. "Sh sh sh..." he says to the door. I sit up straight and I look at him. He is definitely drunk
"Dean? Everything ok?" I ask
"Yes" he says and falls on the bed immediately with his clothes. He smells like alcohol and cigarettes from top to bottom. I take a deep breath and I get up. I take his shoes and jacket off and I cover him with the blanket. I go to the kitchen and I make myself some coffee.
_______________

Later that morning Dean came in the kitchen. "Good morning" I say
"Too loud" he says holding his head. He sits down and lays his head on the table. I pour some coffee in the big cup and I place it next to him. "Thank you" he says
"Want something for your headache?" I ask
"No, I'll be fine" he says and I nod. He takes a big sip of coffee as I sit down next to him.

"Look Dean, I don't want to pressure you baby, I really don't. I get it if you don't want to tell me because it's a family thing. But seeing you like this..." I say and I take his hand. We interlock our fingers. "Seeing you like this hurts me too" I say rubbing the back of his hand.

"I may or may not have heard - accidentally - a part of your fight yesterday. And from the part I've heard, I understand both sides. You are both trying to get used to this new situation--" I was saying but Dean interrupts me
"She joined the Brits" he says
"Wait, what?" I ask
"She joined the British Men of Letters" he repeats
"Doesn't she remember what they did to you?" I ask
"Oh she does. She joined them without telling us and even got us in a case that they assigned to her. In that case Cas almost died, a hunter got killed. But she kept working with them even after that" he says.

"You have nothing to say now?" he asks
"No, I do but you're not going to like it" I say and he nods. "I now understand why you were so pissed yesterday and said those things to her but I think you should let her explain" I suggest
"Explain what?" he asks pissed
"Explain why she did it. Explain why she is still doing it. Maybe she had a good reason. All I'm saying is that you should give her the benefit of the doubt" I say
"And why should I do that?" he asks
"Because she is your mom. You just got her back and you are already pushing her away. And you are going to regret it"
"No, I'm not" he says and gets up. "And if you agree with her, then why don't you join them too? Why are you still here?" he asks
"Dean, don't do that. Don't blame me now just because you're angry. Cause I'm angry too" I say walking to him
"Oh really? Are you angry at my mom or me, because I'm confused" he yells pissed.

"Both" I say and he looks at me surprised
"Really? Both? Why? What did I do?" he asks
"I know that what she did is wrong in so many ways but she is your mom. And this isn't just about her joining them, this is also about you not appreciating what you have" I yell. "So yes, I'm angry at you too because you got a gift that I'll never have. And now you are throwing it away" I say and a tear escapes my eye. "I never met my mother and I lost my dad when I was sixteen. Meanwhile you have a second chance with her and you are just going to ignore her?" I yell and he just looks at me.

"I'm sure that since tomorrow she has tried to contact you many times. So please give her a chance to explain. You don't have to like her again or forgive her yet. But just listen to what she has to say" I say.
"I'm gonna go talk with Sam" he says and leaves the kitchen. I roll my eyes and I wipe my tears.

I go to the library and I sit there. Sam and Dean come too after a couple of minutes but I just ignore them. Dean kneels down next to me "We are going to the Brits' place and have a talk with our mom. We'll be back soon" he says and pecks my cheek
"Are you really?" I ask
"Yes" he says and I hug him. He was taken by surprise but he hugs me back.
"Be careful. Both of you" I say
"We will. I'm sorry that I yelled at you earlier and also... Thank you" he says
"Anytime. I love you" I say
"I love you too" he says and pecks my lips.