Off One's Rocker - Lashton

Chapter Thirty-nine

Chapter Thirty-nine

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Ashton didn't know what to do. He'd been in the psychiatric ward for so long that he couldn't remember what a normal life was. He didn't really want to go to collage or university. He was alright with settling with a job at a shop. Anything which paid him money in life.

His friend already owned an apartment a little away from his family and he took the offer to stay there. Alongside getting a job at a local music store, stacking shelves and suggesting music to customers. It was enjoyable and brought in money.

Ashton knew he lived near Luke now, and it may have been a coincidence or may have been purposely because he simply couldn't find love.

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He had bright blue eyes, blonde hair and he was intoxicated. So was Ashton. "Hi," the boy slurred as he danced up to the curly haired boy.

"Hi," Ashton responded taking a swig of his beer. "You're hot."

"You are too," the boy grinned dancing all over the place.

Ashton giggled, a little sober to know the other boy was hitting on him. "What's your name?" he asked running a finger down his muscular chest. Instantly it reminded him of Luke's bony one.

"Mathew," he told Ashton watching the boy's index finger roam his covered chest. "What's yours?"

"Ashton," the boy told him looking up into his eyes. They were blue, just like Luke's.

"Want to go somewhere private?" Mathew asked placing an arm around the shorter boys shoulder.

"Sure," Ashton agreed a little too drunk to care. He came here alone anyway, in search of a new Luke. And he may have found one.

-

They lasted two whole weeks. Ashton loved Mathews body, he admired how confident he was. But he wasn't Luke. The curly haired boy loved how Luke was insecure and loved to make him feel better.

It seemed to be the opposite. It turned out Mathew really liked Ashton, but the boy couldn't help but feel guilty as if he was only using him because it reminded him of his blonde ex.

"Mathew," Ashton muttered one day when they were laying in bed during the morning.

"Yeah?" he replied turning over to look at his boyfriend.

"I like you," he began and the blonde boy smiled. "But this isn't right."

The boy frowned. "What do you mean? I thought our relationship is great," he asked confused.

"It is. It really is. But I can't help but feel guilty," Ashton pulled a face in sorrow that he was possibly going to break this boys heart. A little like he did Luke's.

"Your not cheating on my are you?" Mathew asked hesitantly. A little worried.

"No! Never!" he quickly assured him.

"What is it then?" he asked confused.

"I had an ex-"

"And you still like him," Mathew guessed.

"Yeah, but there's more to it than that."

"I've got all day," Mathew joked.

"You know I was on a ward yeah?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"Well I met a boy and when I left I thought I should break up with him. I knew it would take him a while till he's recover so he could leave therefore I broke up with him. I told him when he gets out if I'm not taken I would get back with him again."

"And he's out?" Mathew asked.

"No, but you're just like him in ways and I feel like I'm just using you because I miss him."

Mathew nodded understandingly. "So when will he come out?"

"Don't know. Depends if he's still gaining weight or he has gone back to losing it again."

"He's anorexic?" the boy assumed.

Ashton nodded sadly. "It's awful. He harmed as well. Then they figured out he has psychosis."

"Must be a hand full," Mathew joked.

"Occasionally, but he's so sweet and innocent."

"How old is he?"

"Fifteen," Ashton told him knowing he was younger than both of them.

Mathews' eyes widened a little surprised. He didn't expect Ashton to date someone younger let alone who had multiple issues.

"So I guess it's over," he sighed.

"Sorry," Ashton nodded.

"It's fine. I think Luke will need you more. After all, there is plenty of other fish in the sea."

-

Ashton always wondered how Luke was doing. If he was gaining a sufficient amount of weight. Or was he loosing weight again and becoming exceedingly unhealthy. He didn't know.

He got a new phone as well as a new number, therefore, gave it to Alex. However, informed the man that he didn't want Luke to have it until he reached a healthy weight.

Ashton didn't know Luke was home though. And he certainly wasn't expecting him to call him. Yet here he was, sat on his bed scrolling through his phone when an unknown number called him.

He never gave his number out to anyone he didn't know, he never shared it with sites either. Therefore, he immediately assumed it was Luke.

"Luke?" he asked answering the phone.

"Ashton!" he said excitedly down the phone. "I did it. Alex gave me your number!"

"I'm so proud of you Luke," Ashton couldn't help but smile and the anorexics recovery.

Smiling Luke then asked the question which has been eating his mind alive, "Do you still want to go out with me?"

"Of course I do Luke. I love you."

"I love you too Ashton."

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