Running from the pain

Chapter 2

Only one week left in this hell hole! I get dressed and walk around with my sketch book looking for a place to sit down and draw. I've already used about a fifth of the sketch book. I usually just draw at the cliff but today I need a change of scenery. I finally find a bench facing a river that runs into the mountains. I sit down and just draw. I never know what I'm going to draw until I start.

I'm half done drawing when there's a tap on my shoulder. I get pissed when I'm interuped and snap my head around to look at the person.

Jacob.

"What do you want, asshole?"

"I just wanted to talk. I didn't know you liked to draw." Jacob says.

"You would know that if you weren't so self-abosrbed."

"Now come on. It's not my fault that you were boring."

"Excuse me?" I exclaim.

"Anyway, where do you disappear to? No one seems to know where you are."

"Like I would tell you."

"Come on Chloe. You know you can trust me."

"Can I? I told you I love you and you left. You promised you would always be there for me and when I needed you the most, you ran. I'm tired of the lies, Jacob. You can't say I can trust you when I gave you my heart and you tore it to pieces. I can't trust you, and I never will." I say.

"I got scared. I never meant to hurt you, Chloe. You have to trust me on this."

"Like I had to trust that you loved me? Or how you wouldn't hurt me? Or better yet, how you promised we would run away two years ago?"

"You know stuff came up and I couldn't."

"That is the lamest excuse I've ever heard. You can't just make empty promises and then think that I'll trust you. I can't trust anyone anymore. I want to, but I can't. I wish that I could tell people everything but I can't even tell the truth to myself. You tore me apart the day we were supposed to leave. You said you never liked me. You basicaly said that you used me. I will never forgive you. Ever!"

"I-"

"Save it. Just leave me alone. At least you can't mess that up."

He opens his mouth like he's about to say something else but then closes it and leaves. I flip to an empty page and draw. I used to cut until I found drawing. I didn't realize that I had been crying till a tear hit the page. I wipe my face and finish the drawing. I look at it and see a girl pressed against a wall crouching covering her and her hair falling to cover up her face. I stare at it for awhile then finish my other drawing. Once I'm done I walk around some more.

I can't stop thinking about what happened between Jacob and me today and two years ago. It just doesn't add up. He said he didn't like me, now he says he was just scared. He told me he would never hurt me, but now he says he didn't have a choice. He said he would never leave me, now he says that he did because I was boring?

I want to believe but I can't. He hurt me too much. I loved him and part of me still does. He doesn't understand how much he messed me up. He saved me then tried to drown me. I can't deal with him anymore. I can't deal with this town. I wish I could leave today.

I told Ash and Aniya that I want so badly to tell them everyting but just can't bring myself to do it. They told me they understand that I'm not ready to tell them everything, but I know they wish I would. Jacob and my parents are the reason I can't trust. It's not that I don't want to, cause I do, I just can't get the words out. I run into someone and drop all my stuff.

"Sorry." I say.

"It's fine." They say and help me pick up all my stuff.

I thank them and we head our seperate ways. I head home once it gets dark and eat dinner in my room. I fall asleep with tears falling down my face and not knowing why I'm crying, I never cry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wake up the next morning when the doorbell rings. I roll out of bed and go to answer the door.

"Hello?" I say opening the door.

"Did we wake you?" Aniya says.

"Yes you did."

"Sorry." Ash says walking in.

"Sure you can come in." I say sarcasiclly.

"Thanks." Aniya says.

"What are you guys doing here?" I ask.

"Jacob told us you talked to him yesterday." Ash says.

"So what?" I ask not fully understanding.

"Well, what happened?" Aniya asks with a touch of excitment in her voice.

"Nothing. I just told him how he ruined my heart and how I can never trust him again." I say.

"Damn. Someone's harsh." Ashley says.

"Maybe. But It's the truth." I retort.

"We know that." Aniya says.

"Why don't we just watch a movie or something?" I suggest not wanting to stay on this topic.

"Fine with me." They say.

We end up watching every Kevin Hart movie Netflix has. That results in a sleepover. Six more days then we're out of here. Six more days then I'm free. Six more days till my life turns around. I can't belive that this is happening. I mean, I'm just some small town girl who made a friend that lives in New York.

Now I get my dream job, I get to live in my dream city, and I get to escape. All this happened because of Royal. I don't know how I could ever thank her. I'm not sure what I'll tell my parents or if i'll tell them. All I know is that I'm going to start loving ife a little more.

*******I know this chapter sucks. I hope you liked it anyway. I'm not sure where this story is headed but I'm excited to see what happens. As always......

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