EZH #5: Hope Tuason [ON GOING]

Chapter 14

Chapter 14

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Hope Tuason

The party that we would go to was later in the evening pa. We had the whole morning to ourselves since nag-decide na rin Kuya Kal na we won't go to school or anything. Pwede kami mag go wherever basta we would be back by five to prepare for the party.

And because of that, naisipan ko na pilitin si Kuya T to spend the day with me. And Ivana. Well... he didn't know Ivana was going to be with us. I, perhaps, forgot to tell him.

Nakalimutan ko kasi I basically had to wrestle Kuya T para lang sumakay siya sa car ko. Kung sinabi ko pa sa kanya baka need ko pa ng tulong ng mga men in black niya sumama lang siya sa akin.

Maybe that's the reason why Kuya T was raising his brow on me when he saw my car was going towards a standing figure sa labas ng isang subdivision not far from our condominium building.

"You didn't tell me we have some company." Walang emosyong sabi ni Kuya T. Medyo feeling ko nagpawis ang brows ko sa sobrang serious niya. "Sabi ko na, e. Kanina pa talaga ako duda sa 'yo."

I chuckled, a little scared.

"Sorry, Kuya." I sheepishly answered his statement. "But Ivana's been worried that you're mad at her. I just want you to show her that you're not."

Nginitian ko si Kuya na sinagot niya naman ng irap. He chuckled while shaking his head. He rested his elbow on the little space on my car's window before putting his hand on his mouth.

"Don't forget that I'm only doing this for you, Hope." Seryosong sabi ni Kuya. Tumingin siya sa akin, his facial expression really really serious. "Ayoko na sana gumawa ng dahilan para mas umasa pa si Ivana, pero ayoko rin naman na bothered ka dahil iniisip niyang galit ako sa kanya." Kuya sighed. "Last na 'to. After I've cleared the air between us, I won't make her feel that she have a chance with me anymore. Kasi sa totoo lang? I can see that she's the type to be easily encouraged by positive actions towards her. Hindi ko na kasalanan kung iba ang maisip niya kapag naging normal ako ulit sa kanya."

Kumunot ang noo ko pero tumango na lang din ako sa sinabi ni Kuya T. He has a point naman kasi... Ivana really does have a tendency to overthink actions done towards her.

Which was funny kasi... my actions were all showing my feelings for her but she couldn't see it. She couldn't see what I feel for her through my actions. Kahit over thinker naman siya sa actions ni Kuya T.

Siguro kasi gusto niya naman si Kuya. Hindi naman niya ako gusto, so why nga naman siya iisipan ng iba ang actions ko? For her, what I do were all normal. Kala niya suguro I treat mg friends the same way as I treat her.

If she only knew...

Kuya does things for me then I do things for Ivana. No one in the equation was doing things for Kuya T's sake. If anything, siya rin talaga ang talo rito.

But he made his choice. I couldn't pull him back from what he already decided on.

Kinakabahan ako roon sa decision ni Kuya T but it seemed like the best thing to do right now kaya wala na rin ako nasabi.

It just... it sounded right. What Kuya T wanted to do sounded right to me.

Siguro kasi kaya ako kinakabahan is because di ko sure if paano ite-take ni Ivana 'yung magiging actions ni Kuya T sa kanya today. What if she started to hope again just like what Kuya T was worried about?

In a way, nakaka-guilty rin. Because they both didn't ask for this. They didn't ask me to make a way for them to be okay again. I just did it kasi... kasi gusto ko na okay si Ivana. Kasi... kasi gusto ko masaya siya.