Unexpected

Chapter 42

A month later...

"Since you don't even want to hear me, I am forced to do something like this.

To tell you the truth it's even easier if I write it. I don't know... I am not good with words. You always get the wrong meaning out of it, or maybe that's not it... maybe you just don't want to understand. Have you thought of it?

I am tired of running after you. I haven't done anything else for the past month than trying to get you to listen to me and saying that I love you. I love you! I love you... How many times do you want me to repeat it? I am sure of that and even when I thought I didn't, I did. I have always loved you. But that doesn't mean anything to you now does it?

I know my head spins in strange ways sometimes, but you should have given me the chance to explain. Actually, I explained myself to you, but you always refused to listen. I was confused... I guess I had all the right to be confused after all the things you did and the things you said. The things we did to one another... I was right when I said that I wanted to be with you for the right reasons. Was that wrong? I don't think so...

You, on the other hand, you always had to have things done the way you wanted, and when you wanted it. That was what in fact caused us to crash and burn, because you have to have it your way. If you loved me the way you say you do, you'd give me the time I have asked for. It's not that I don't have what it takes to make you happy, I think I do. It's that you think of something in a way and refuse that it might be done in some other way. We both made huge mistakes. Not only just me, but you also did. See that! I am not the only one to blame.

It's ok... I throw my towel down. I am done. I can't do this anymore and I can't cry for you anymore. I am glad you have been such a great father to Willow, and that's all you're going to represent in my life from now on. It was your choice after all. This time, it was your entire choice and you cannot blame me for it.

I want you to be happy, and I am going to try and be happy myself. I will find someone like you, but I don't know if I'll ever love anyone the way I love you.

I love you. I DO love you.

Cleo"

Cleo put the letter in the envelope and sealed it. Then, she put it in the airport's mail box. Right after, a woman announced her flight and she pushed the stroller to the embarking gate. Before, she had already left their luggage.

"Let's go back to Hawaii." She breathed, looking down at Willow that slept peacefully with her pink pacifier in her mouth coming up and down as she sucked on it.

Tears came to her eyes as she pushed her baby's stroller along the busy airport. All she wanted was some peace and quiet and be able to let go of him for good. He had been present in Willow's life, but they haven't seen or talked to one another for the past month. They would communicate through a solicitor about Willow and a nanny would come to pick up Willow so he could see her and be with her. It had been needed his permission for her to get out of the country with the baby and even if she explained she didn't know for how long she would be away, he still signed the paper. That gesture actually surprised her. With tears running down her face heavier than she thought, she was stopped by an old lady near the embarkment gate.

"Are you alright young girl?" The woman asked her and Cleo looked at her a little startled.

"What?" She asked feeling so lost that very instant.

"You are sobbing so loud." The woman told her.

"I am?" Cleo asked feeling her shoulders shake again. "Oh..." She took both hands to her face and loud cries came out. "I am so sorry." She said feeling like she was bothering other passengers.