The God of Mischief | Loki fan-fiction

A battle of wit.

I watched as everyone leapt into action. Bullets and debris started to fly everywhere and the maniacal laugh of Deadpool was the main sound in the air. S.H.E.I.L.D clones, as he called them, were coming towards him but getting no where near.

"Bang! Bang, bang, bang!" He screamed as he shot at multiple victims. He was like nothing I had ever seen before. He was fast, very fast. He could appear where he chose and seemed to have a healing ability.

"God damn it!" Coulson shouted in a fit of frustration as another wave of soldiers were wiped out. Like a God, Coulson stood up and marched through flying bullets and flying people over to a truck. He pulled out a pretty big gun and hoisted it onto his suited shoulders.

"Ahhh! No fair! Why did Santa come early to you but not to me?" Deadpool whined upon noticing Coulson's gun. He grabbed a knife from his thigh pocket and quickly launched it at the centre of Coulson's gun, making it explode into little pieces but most missing Coulson. Deadpool started doing a celebratory dance but I ran over to Coulson. He was unconscious but alive. This Midgard team of defence was obviously failing, I had to help. Still in the Earth style dress I slid over the bonnet of a truck landing, empty handed in front of Deadpool.

"Oh boy, oh boy! Santa did come early this year!" He screamed out like a child.

"I will give you one chance Deadpool." I said calmly. Underneath his mask I could almost sense a smirk from his mouth. He suddenly appeared in front of me with his gun held at point blank.

"BANG!" He shouted making me flinch. "Haha, just kidding." He laughed. I had had enough and I did warn him. Kicking both feet up, I flipped backwards kicking the gun held at my head out of his reach. As I landed I reached for his now spare hand and twisted it, in turn twisting his body and other gun out of the way of my body. He pulled the trigger as I did so, just grazing the side of my cheek. I now had his arm twisted leaning on my shoulder, with my back to him, this was a very vulnerable position. Deadpool realised this and cart wheeled out of the twist, straightening his arm once more. Now free and flexible he quickly elbowed me in the face, sending me backwards.

"Just give up." I pleaded as I could feel the pulse in my head. He appeared behind me and punched me hard in the back. He then appeared at my front, punching my stomach. He then repeated his and with every punch he shouted,

"Best. Day. Ever!" Like a child in the park. I turned grabbing onto the cloth of his shoulders, flipping him over my head. He groaned as he connected with the floor. My head was now throbbing, hot blood oozing down the side of my face. I grabbed Deadpool's other gun and threw it out of his reach.

"My babies!" He screeched after his guns. He growled at me as he stood up, drawing two long swords from his back. He started to flick his wrists, swaying the swords faster and faster towards me.

"This isn't fair!" I cried out in disbelief as I moved backwards to dodge the increasingly closing swords. I stumbled over some rock in the middle of the road. I frantically searched around with my hands for anything to defend myself with. My hands finally clasped around a thick metal pole. I quickly held it in front of me as one of Deadpool's swords came down swiping towards me. The two metals connected pinging and screeching terribly. Deadpool had hit the pole with such force the sword was now embedded in the pole. He was trying to yank it out but it was firmly in there. Taking the opportunity I kicked him back, making him release his grip on the sword. Once again I tossed it to one side, hearing it clatter on the concrete floor. He was now down to one sword. He started jabbing it towards me with an occasional swipe. I had to lean back at a full ninety degree angle to dodge a swift blade movement. All this time I was dying to use my power. The fire would end this in a matter of seconds, but I have no quarrel with this world, and they might see me as a threat. I then decided under no circumstances was they to find out I was an Asgardian. Deadpool now jabbed his last remaining weapon towards my face but I brought both hands together stopping the blade between my palms. Deadpool screamed like a little girl as I chucked it to the floor. He made a fist and launched it towards me but I just grabbed it and squeezed it tight. As an Asgardian I have always had superior strength to humans.  He coiled onto the floor. Whilst he coward on the floor he still kept his sense of humour.

"Can I just ask...are those real?" He asked looking up.

"I beg your pardon!" I exclaimed in shock.

"Err...your teeth. They're just so darn shiny and straight!" He grinned manically. 

"Good night Deadpool." I smiled back slamming his head in to the concrete, knocking him out.

"You did this?" A surprised voice asked from behind me. I turned to see Coulson standing there with his eyebrows raised in shock. I nodded silently as a flying metal machine hovered over us and a woman dressed in a tight black suit and red frizzy hair dropped down from a rope.

"What is going on...who is she?" She demanded to Coulson while looking me up and down.

"She has done your job for you." Coulson was obviously annoyed with the woman. She walked over to Deadpool and lifted him up and put him in the now landed flying machine. He was then secured and she followed him in.

"You better come with me, the director will want to meet you." Coulson said holding out his hand, gesturing for me to get into the same metal thing. "In the helicopter." He said sternly and I obeyed. I climbed in and Coulson followed. I could feel myself rising as the so called Helicopter rose and began to fly.

"What's your name?" The red haired lady asked me. I froze. I did not think about names. I could not use my real name, it would raise alarms. Both Coulson and the woman sat there looking at me until I replied. I thought back to the book, my favourite book of an Asgardian and a human. I decided to use her name.

"Claire Vasko." I replied clearly. I knew they probably suspected it was a fake name but it was all I had at the present moment. A banging came from behind me making me jump and waking Deadpool up. I turned to see a man in a cage, like a jail cell behind me.

"Weasel old buddy...where have you been hiding?" Deadpool asked the locked up man in a deranged manor. 

"Err...in the hospital remember. You...you stabbed me in the leg." The man relied timidly.

"Oh yeah, that's right. But I had to...you were about to steal the last cheesy puff!" Deadpool's voice was serious and I could not help but feel a little bit disturbed.

"Uh! They were my bag of cheesy puffs!" The man argued back.

"That's not how I remembered it!" Deadpool screamed getting up. The woman sat him back down. She was clearly annoyed that I had took down Deadpool instead of her.

"Black widow...." Deadpool addressed the woman next to me, at least a knew a name to call her now.

"Hello Deadpool." Her voice sounded dry and uncaring.

"I feel I have known you long enough now to ask...are you putting on weight?" To this black widow only answered him with a swift slap across his face. I felt my stomach go fluffy and light as we were beginning to descend. I stepped off of the helicopter and onto a circle landing pad. On the floor was a white crest, of what looked like a blocked bird. The blades of the helicopter blew my hair over my face. As I flipped my hair back over I spotted a tall, dark, bald man standing there looking at me. Coulson was speaking to him but his eye was firmly fixed on me. I say eye, he had an eye patch over one. He wore a long black leather coat that also was being blown by the helicopter. I walked over to them, greeting them with the same sour face as they did me.

"I am director Nick Fury and who the hell might you be?"