Slasher X Reader | Book 1

44. Hannibal X Psychologist!Reader Pt. 2

  Your shoes echoed around the hallway as you walked. You were careful not to stray from the centre of the hall, careful not to get too close to the cells on either side. The inmates could be grabby.

  You were at the Baltimore State Hospital for the Criminally Insane to do a psychiatric evaluation for an inmate and oh, how you had been dreading it. Since you saw the file for the request land on your desk, an awful pit in your stomach had formed and refused to disappear. You knew this day was coming, but you weren't prepared for when it finally did.

Your heart was hammering in your chest as you approached the cell at the end of the hall. A single folding chair was set up for you, should you decide to stay that long. You felt yourself beginning to panic, but quickly pushed that feeling down. You could do this.

  You arrived at the cell, but couldn't find it within yourself to meet his eyes. Instead, you sat down in the chair, rifling through the papers you brought for some distraction. You hoped he wouldn't notice you were avoiding his gaze on purpose.

  "Hello, Y/N."

  You steeled yourself and looked up.

  "Hello, Dr. Lecter."

  "So formal." He grinned.

  "This is a formal evaluation," you stated. "If you'll look through it, that is."

"If you're asking, then how could I refuse? Send it through."

You stood from your seat and walked over to the tray they sent his food through. You watched him, noticed how he took a deliberate step backwards to ensure your safety. You put the papers in and slid them to his side. You returned to the metal chair and watched as Hannibal retrieved the evaluation, thumbing through the loose papers. You had had to remove all the staples before you came.

Hannibal took a moment to scan the papers, a bored look on his face. He glanced up at you once he was finished, those blue eyes burning into yours.

"This is all they want to know?" He finally said.

"It's just a surface evaluation," you explained. "They want to see if you're willing to cooperate before throwing the heavy stuff at you."

"Well, it's not very stimulating. Intellectually, at least." He dropped the papers onto the desk they allowed in his cell. He paced in a slow, deliberate circle. "How about you, Y/N? Are you finding this visit very stimulating?"

You ignored the question. "Will you fill out the survey?"

"Answer my question, Y/N."

You sighed. "No, Dr. Lecter, I don't."

"That's a lie and we both know it. This is very hard for you, isn't it?"

You opened your mouth to respond, but Hannibal cut you off, raising a finger.

"Don't lie, Y/N. I'll know," he said.

You clenched your jaw, forcing yourself to breathe evenly. He was just doing this to get in your head, you knew that. You knew him. But that didn't stop it from being so effective.

"If you want to know the truth so badly, yes," you answered in a clipped tone. "Yes, this is hard for me."

"Why is that?" Hannibal pressed, a knowing smile on his face.

"You know why."

"I want to hear you say it."

"I'm not going to."

"Then you can tell the head-peepers I won't fill out their paltry survey."

"Dr. Lecter--"

"Quid pro quo, Y/N. If you want something from me, you have to give me something first."

"Give you something?" You could feel the tears burning hot and angry in your eyes. "I'll tell you what I gave you."

You stood from your chair, standing in front of the plexiglass barrier, face to face with him. You knew you shouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing you like this, but you had had enough. You were so sick of that smug face he put on and you desperately wanted to break it.

"I gave you everything, Hannibal," you told him, hating the way your voice was shaking. "I gave you everything and you broke my heart. Do you have any idea what you put me through?"

Hannibal simply smiled. "Do enlighten me."

You felt the rage boiling hot inside you, felt the tears spilling down your cheeks. "I had to work so hard to get people to trust me again. Nobody wanted to engage with the one who dated Hannibal the Cannibal because surely I knew what you were doing and just didn't tell anyone. I've spent nights lying awake thinking about your victims, how I read about their deaths and then went to meet their murderer for dinner.

"And do you know how many hours I've spent agonizing over the possibility that you fed your victims to me? Do you know how many hours I've spent sick to my stomach at the thought? Did you even care if what you did affected me at all?!"

By the end of your rant, you were breathless. Everything that had built up inside you over the last several years finally had the chance to explode. Chest heaving, face burning, you simply stood there, wanting some sort of reaction from the man who had hurt you so. But Hannibal Lecter didn't move, only stared at you with that cold and calculating gaze.

  You turned around, furiously wiping at your face. You needed to leave. You needed to get outside where the sunlight and fresh air was. You felt like you were suffocating in this dark hallway, like it would swallow you up and never let you see the light again.

  "Y/N?" You heard Hannibal's soft voice.

  You didn't turn around. You shut your eyes tight and focused on breathing in and out evenly.

  "Y/N, look at me," Hannibal pressed.

  You ignored him for a few moments more before you faced him again. That awful smirk was finally gone and he regarded you with an expression you couldn't quite read.

"If it makes you feel any better, Y/N, I never shared any of my victims with you," he said.

Despite the grotesque way it was worded, a small wave of relief rushed through your veins at his words. You had absolutely no reason to trust anything he was saying, but deep down, you knew you could. The bond that had formed between the two of you so long ago still remained, no matter how tenuous and thin.

"Thank you, Hannibal," you said after a moments silence.

"For you, my dear, of course," he responded kindly. The way he spoke made your heart ache for a time long since passed.

"So, will you fill out the evaluation?" You asked, forcing yourself to get back on track. Your emotions had spiralled out of control and done a nosedive straight into the past.

"I suppose I can," Hannibal answered casually. "Can I expect to see you again tomorrow to pick it up?"

"Will you have it done by then?"

"If you're coming to see me, I will."

"I'll try to fit you into my schedule."

  Hannibal offered you a warm smile, one that actually felt sincere. You tried your best to return it. A tiny shred of hope made its way through your heart. Hope that you would see him again without it being so painful. Hope that, now that you had finally faced him, you could truly begin to heal. Perhaps the two of you could even get on friendly terms once again.

  You knew you would never again have the man you once knew, the relationship that had been lost, but maybe, the pieces could finally be picked up and rearranged into a different, better picture.

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so this took longer to come out than i would have liked but i mean what can ya do? lol

i hope y'all enjoyed this! i had a lot of fun writing it x3

i just finished reading silence of the lambs and have just started hannibal so i knew i had to get back to this

i know it's taking a while, but i will get to all the requests in this book eventually! thank you for being so patient☺️