Region-Beta Paradox (Avengers X Male Reader)

Within Us Are Songs of Darkness Waiting To Be Sung

"What was his name?" Steve asked Tony.

"The kid? It was James, I think."

"Take care of Y/N." Steve said and turned. Tony called after him and Steve did hear his name being called but he couldn't really get himself to stop and respond. His ears were ringing, his head seemed like it would explode, and his legs were threatening to bring him down. He walked faster and took the stairs instead of the elevator, fearing his legs would give up if were to stop and something in him told him that this time, he wouldn't be able to get up. He got out of the hospital and ran.

It was better. This is better, he told himself. He tried to focus and only think of the orphanage, the destination, the place he needs to be at right now. Was it really this close? Steve wondered as it came into the view, or had Steve really not just noticed how long he had been running for? His calves had started to sting, so it must've been from the sprint which was rare for him. So it must've been long.

He finally stopped in front of the elevator, looking up. The building was still vacated and Steve could see where the fire had broken out from the marks. As his legs came to a halt, a million thoughts rushed at him in violent torrents.

Would he find James in there, hiding?

Had he really just run away and was now found, safe with the others?

He gulped and felt his throat dry. He didn't want to consider it. The note had said so, but he still didn't want to believe it.

If they really took him... Was he even alive right now?

The note. He looked down at his hand. He had crumpled the paper in his fist as he had run. His heart sank.

Was it a trap? Were they really just after you? Had Steve really left you alone for what could possibly just have been a bluff?

He found himself walking into the building before he could even think clearly. Once he was in the building, his instinct took him to James' room. He took a deep breath and opened the door that was left partly open.

There it was. He almost saw it all at once. The open window, the nail scratches on the carpet from under the bed. The tiffin. He couldn't hold himself up anymore. He dropped down to his knees and reached for the tiffin from under the bed. It was the one he had brought pancakes for James in.

And he screamed. He clenched the tiffin to his chest and screamed. Screamed for mercy, for James, to have a normal life with you. He screamed for everything that he was denied and everything a part of him knew he could never have. He screamed to be able to love someone without them being taken away. He waited for tears to come, to be able to cry but he couldn't. He felt his chest turning and clenching and no matter how much he screamed, it wouldn't go away. He dropped down to the floor, his screams turning into muffled "why"s. Why James? Was it because Steve had dared to love him? James was gone and he didn't even know if he was still alive. You were in a hospital fighting for your life. Only because he had dared to love you. It was his fault. He was the reason for- His heart skipped a beat when he saw a figure under the bed. A blanket. James' blanket. And so the tears came.

The picture was clear in his mind, and he cursed his SHIELD mind for clicking in. James must've been under the bed, probably fallen asleep when the fire broke out. Everybody else got out and he had been left behind, giving them the chance to break in and take him. But even then, why hadn't-

Steve's finger curled around the tiffin and he froze. This wasn't the tiffin Steve had given James. It had looked exactly like it but... Steve looked down and turned it around. Steve distinctively remembered James scratching his name on the back of the time when Steve had come to visit him. There was no mark there. He opened it and it hit him then, it had bits of cookies still left. But something else caught his olfactory. This effluvium held itself separate from the sweet smell of the cookies. James' picture came into his mind again, tucked under his bed eating the cookies hidden from everyone else, unaware of what was inside the cookies.

This other stench ran through his head. He remembered it from somewhere but just couldn't put his finger where. He laboured his mind and tried to remember. He felt as if he had smelt it in Bruce's lab before but he still couldn't be sure. His mind had just stopped working. All he could think about was James under his bed, men breaking in from the window and taking him.