"i don't wanna go home." felix said, playing with the sleeves of the sweater he was wearing.
"why not?" jisung asked, scrolling through his phone.
felix sighed, "i said some s—stuff to my sister.. and i don't know how i can face her." he mumbled, his voice getting quieter and quieter.
"hey, look at me." the older said, and felix looked up at him.
"what did you say to her? it couldn't have been that bad." he shrugged with a small smile.
the younger only sighed again, "i said i wasn't her brother anymore, because she never wanted one in the first place." he whispered, his voice shaking slightly.
"i don't know what to do, i hurt her a—and—"
"shh, lix. don't speak. you said she never wanted a brother?" jisung questioned quietly, and felix nodded his head.
"she should know how you feel, i'll be with you every step of the way." he whispered, playing with the youngers hand.
"why'd she say that?" he asked, looking up at felix with confusion when he pulled his hand away.
"you don't—"
"i'm adopted." felix said quickly, slapping a hand over his mouth in shock.
"y—you're adopted?" jisung asked, staring at the boy in shock.
felix bit his lip tightly to the point he could taste blood and nodded his hand, his eyes switching in between jisung's and the floor.
jisung tilted his head, "and she never wanted you.. as h—her brother?" felix nodded again.
jisung sighed and pulled the younger into a tight hug. felix felt a tear slip down his cheeks and he gasped silently.
"i never realized.. how much it hurts." he whispered, putting his face into the olders chest.
he cried silently into the olders chest, the only sound being very quiet and muffled cries. it hurt and he wanted to let it all out.
it felt like the pain would never stop, it felt like he never had a true family.
his mother, always smothering him. he was grateful for her, but at times, it felt like too much. like she was only doing this out of pity.
his father, just felt like basically a stranger. neither of them willing to get to closer, feeling like it was wrong or weird.
and his sister. she was more than a stranger, she was a bully. always making sure to remind him that he didn't belong in this family, making him feel like he didn't deserve it.
he just wanted someone who felt like home.
he missed being in his real mothers arms, whenever she came to pick him up from school. or whenever she would comfort him from a nightmare or from the bullies at school.
his real father. maybe he should've missed him, but he didn't. and he felt terrible because of it.
he hadn't realized it, only when he pulled away and stared into jisung's eyes was when he knew.
he found someone who feels like home.
he sighed and hugged jisung tightly, "please don't leave me." he whispered.
"i promise." jisung whispered back, hugging him tighter.
——
short but so sweet
YOU ARE READING
𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 & 𝐂𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐒 | ON HOLD
Fanfiction"but strawberries and cigarettes always taste like you." in which all felix wants is to put his restless mind at ease, but when he tries, a stranger who smells of cigarette smoke comes into his life. [ H.JS X L.FL ]
