so here they were, laying in the middle of road. sure, it was dangerous but they couldn't find it in them to care. because in that moment, they felt good. better than good.
it wasn't an exciting feeling, they weren't smiling bright and laughing. but that didn't mean they weren't happy.
felix didn't even know what time it was, his phone had died a long time ago. they were currently listening to music from jisung's phone, many different songs playing.
at first when jisung had laid down on the road, felix was confused, but it didn't take him long to lay down beside the boy. they were sharing cigarettes, and people walking by stared at them confusion.
as he stared up at the stars, felix couldn't help but smile. he felt like was in a book, or a movie.
;)
it made him and everything around him feel unreal, like he was floating. he couldn't help but laugh, feeling jisung tap his arm.
"you good, lixie?" he asked and felix just laughed again and nodded. "yeah, i just feel like i'm in a movie right now." he said, his smile still lingering on his face. it took a few seconds but eventually jisung smiled as well and scoffed at him, before they both started laughing at basically nothing.
"doesn't this just feel like we're in a cliché movie?" felix asked after a few seconds. "like, we just skipped school! and now we're laying in the middle of road, looking at the sky!"
jisung chuckled before he nodded, "yeah, you're right." he said, "but, what movie?" he asked, turning onto his side to look at felix.
"i dunno.. '10 things i hate about you?' or maybe.. 'the perks of being a wall flower?'" jisung instantly gasped out loud at felix's words. "no way! that's too sad!"
"so? it's a good movie—"
"but it's too sad!"
"whatever, old man—"
"i'm a day older than you!"
——
"what if your life was a song?" jisung questioned quietly, the two of them still laying in the middle of the road for god knows how long.
".. 'all i ever asked.' by rachel chinouriri." felix said quietly after a few seconds. "i've never heard it." felix chuckled softly at jisung's words, before he grabbed the boys phone from out of his pocket.
"hey! what are you doing—"
"i'm playing the song, dummy." felix smiled, and jisung chuckled.
"i'm not a dummy—"
"you're my dummy." the younger said softly, and jisung smiled. "that's cheesy."
"you love cheesy." felix whispered, and jisung shrugged. "maybe." he whispered, before the song began playing at the low volume from the eldest's phone.
jisung hummed softly as he listened closely to the song, "why is it so sad?" he asked after a few seconds. "i like sad songs."
jisung stared at felix for a few moments, before he quietly spoke. "i think mine is 'down.' by jason walker."
"or maybe 'drowning.' by a boogie wit da hoodie—"
felix instantly began laughing as soon as jisung finished speaking, and jisung hit him on the shoulder. "it's a good song!"
"are you stuck in twenty seventeen? that songs so old!"
"who cares, it's a good song!"
their laughs soon settled down into small, content smiles on their faces. music was still playing from the elders phone, but it didn't matter because all that mattered in the moment was them.
felix turned his head to look over at the boy, who was still smiling, with his eyes closed. his own smile grew into one of fondness.
he couldn't believe this was real. he felt like jisung was perfect, too perfect. because how could someone like him, ever love someone like felix?
he didn't understand why, how, where or when he fell in love with the elder. it just.. happened. it took him the longest time to realize he loved the boy.
but when he finally realized, he wasn't surprised. sure, he was scared for a split moment, because he wasn't sure if he was capable of loving, most importantly, of being loved.
it took felix awhile to realize why exactly he felt this way, but everytime jisung would look at him, and he would look at jisung, everything felt....
right.
if that's what you could call it.
felix felt like he was on drugs whenever he was with the boy, as if he couldn't feel his own face from how much he loved him.
but no drug was ever going to be as deadly as han jisung, and his smile, his laugh, his eyes, his voice, his hair, his hands, his humour, his everything. felix was intoxicated just by one look at the boy.
the boy sighed heavily, catching jisung's attention, making the boy look over at him. "what's wrong?" he asked, a frown appearing on his face. felix gently shook his head, "nothing, just.."
"just, what?" felix looked over once again at jisung, the smallest smile appearing in his face.
"i love you, sung." he whispered, looking away and back up at the stars.
he already knew what the boys reaction would be, but he was still scared, which is why he didn't want to see it. he noticed jisung sit up straight, making him also sit up straight to look at the boy.
"sung?" he asked, his eyes widening when the elder suddenly grabbed him by the collar, smashing his lips onto his own. before he could even kiss back, jisung pulled away and leaned his head on felix's.
"i love you too, lix." he whispered, and a smile grew on both of their faces.
"we're not in a movie, sung." felix said quietly with a sheepish smile. "maybe, but if we were—..."
"hmm?" felix hummed at jisung, waiting for him to finish his sentence.
"it'd be my favourite movie."
——
shitting sobbing crying i think this is my favourite chapter of this book :')
(and sorry for the late update and any mistakes!! </3)
YOU ARE READING
𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 & 𝐂𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐒 | ON HOLD
Fanfiction"but strawberries and cigarettes always taste like you." in which all felix wants is to put his restless mind at ease, but when he tries, a stranger who smells of cigarette smoke comes into his life. [ H.JS X L.FL ]
