The Heart Wants What it Wants

Chapter 2: Time Off

Chapter 2: Time Off

Sleep did not come easy that night but at least she was off the next day. The next morning, Izzie was splayed on the bathroom floor refusing to move or change. Everyone took turns watching her and making sure she was ok. Then Finn showed up and he knew that something had happened with Derek but still he wanted to keep on seeing her. Then Derek came too to tell her he loved her and she had a choice to make. Meredith's head was swimming in a pool of her own emotions and she just did not know what to do or what to think.

What was the right choice? How could she pick in a way that would not hurt anyone? Was there a way to not hurt anyone?

She lay in bed but once more sleep was just a joke. She tossed and turned all night. She thought about Finn and his plans and he was good for her. Then there was Derek and what he made her feel. Though after everything that had happened she was not sure the feelings were as strong as before. Finally there was Addison. She cursed at herself for feeling what she felt. Like how much more complicated did she need her life to get?

There were too many thoughts, way too many. She looked at the clock and it read 3:42 am. She knew she would not be getting any sleep so she got up from bed and went down to the living room to watch another one of her mother's surgeries. She heard Izzie in the kitchen a few minutes after plopping herself down on the couch. She knew it was her because the sounds of pans and the opening and shutting of the oven.

"Izzie?" Meredith called.

"I'm making muffins. Would you like some muffins? They'll be delicious." Izzie said not even looking at her.

"Sure Izzie. I'll eat some muffins." Meredith replied and opted to leave her friend alone.

She went back to the living room looking at the tv but not really seeing it, her brain still flooding with too many thoughts. Before she knew it the alarm on her cellphone was going off so with a groan she went back up to her room to get ready.

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Addison stood on the threshold to Richard's office looking like a hot mess with a bucket hat. She wore five unmatched pieces of clothing with no makeup, her hair loose and messy. Richard was folding the blankets that were covering his couch as he noticed her.

"You've got coffee on your shirt." Richard said by way of greeting.

"You had a bed on your couch." She countered. "I need a day off to do some drinking."

"No laboring mothers today?" He asked sitting down and tapping the spot next to him on the couch.

"Nope. I think God knows I need to do some drinking. I also need to do some crying but I have proud tear ducts." She replied sitting down.

"You wanna talk about it, Addie, or do you just want to be glib a little while longer?" He asked knowingly.

"Why are you living in your office?" She asked by way of reply.

"Marriage is hard." He sighed heavily.

"Well... thank goodness mine seems just about over." She replied, tears stinging in her eyes.

"Go Addie. Take the day. But please be careful and don't drive." He said placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

Addison left the hospital and made her way to Joe's a little surprised no one noticed her. Just a little surprised because, who would notice her? Derek had not. Mark had for a while and then noticed someone else. Maybe she did but it was because she had made herself known to her.