The Heart Wants What it Wants

Chapter 22: Trials of Pain

Chapter 22: Trials of Pain

Her knuckles were white as she closed her hands into tight fists on her lap, her nails digging into her skin. She was concentrating heavily on her breathing as she had practiced with the therapist. It was almost working, she was almost calm. However, almost, was not enough and she kept getting angrier at herself and her anxiety.

Her eyes locked on the wooden door next to the stand where the judge would be. Next to where she would be testifying if it was needed. At least that's what the lawyer had told them. Pictures should be enough but just in case he had prepared both her and Meredith to take the stand. He would also be coming through that wooden door in a few minutes.

The courtroom had mostly cleared out after the previous hearing. Now, only her friends and his family remained. Bailey had been very upset over not being here with them but Richard needed someone he could trust back in the hospital since he and Mark were here with them. What had the resident somewhat calm was that Cristina had promised she would send updates as soon as she could.

Amelia had come to say a tentative hello before settling next to Carolyn and Kathleen, who kept sending dirty looks. She could care less about her and her idiocy. Besides, she was too nervous to even care about it.

Her leg kept on bouncing and she suddenly started to chew on the inside of her cheek. The anxiety and fear building up higher and higher. She could no longer hear Mark breathing beside her. Her own breaths and heartbeat filled her ears, silencing everything else. A tap on her thigh made her snap out of it and turn to Meredith.

"Hey." Meredith spoke softly.

"Hey." Addison replied in equal tone.

"Is it..." Meredith began and bit her lip.

"Meredith?" Addison asked, growing concerned. All her attention shifted away from the door and the trial, honing on the blonde nervously biting her lip.

"Can you hold my hand?" Meredith asked sheepishly.

"Hold your hand?" Addison tilted her head in question but as she looked into her eyes she understood.

"I just... I need to fe..." Meredith tried but grew flustered.

"You need to feel that I'm here. That he doesn't have me. That I'm safe." Addison said knowingly.

She understood because that was exactly what she was wanting to do. Derek had threatened to hurt Meredith and he had managed to do it. She just wanted to feel her warmth in her hand. She had a thought that it would calm her. She had meant to ask earlier but her anxiety overtook her.

"Yes." Meredith muttered, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Addison managed a smile and opened her hand, offering it for her to take. Meredith's whole solemn expression washed out as her face lit up with a smile when she took her hand. Cristina chuckled lightly next to Meredith, making Addison's attention shift to her as well as Meredith's.

"I'm glad you're here to hold her hand 'cause I don't hold hands." The brunette shrugged, making both Addison and Meredith chuckle lightly.

"Behave, ladies." Mark said beside Addison.

"You behave. You've been ogling the stenographer the whole time we've been here." Meredith said as she rolled her eyes. "How many times have you made her blush?"

"I don't know but it's fun. Let's make it a game." Mark said with a smug smirk before they all began to chuckle.

"Children." Richard warned behind them.