It was under control

six

After the therapy session with Doctor Carson had concluded, a very low mood Jules was escorted back to her messy room. Wracking her brain around what she had spoken about with him, after her outburst and self harming incident, she felt disappointed, unable to carry on almost. You see just like this story, Jules's life never quite flowed in order, always out of time and in the wrong moment, she always felt as though she could never catch up with the events, alway out of time. So as she sat on the floor, her legs outstretched and back against her bed, she contemplated everything she has been through. Until Tom strode in, standing at the door with his hands on his hips, "shall we clean this room?"

"Leave it." Jules dragged her knees up towards her and leant her head onto her knees and looked at the wall, to the side of her to avoid eye contact.

"You can't live in this mess Jules, why don't I clean it, you don't have to do anything."

"I said leave it."

"Jules what's happened? Why are you pushing me away?" He came and crouched in front of the distanced girl.

"Tom just leave me alone." Is Tom going to push her boundaries or leave her be? He is not one to walk around on eggshells with Jules, but nor does he neglect her wishes.

"When's the last time you took a shower?"

"Piss off."

"No Jules, you have completely neglected your room, your health and your personal hygiene. Let me help you, because I understand looking after yourself is tough right now, so why don't I lighten the load." He stood up and began to fold and sort through the clothes, getting rid of dirty towels and picking up random torn out pages of books. Placing the broken and ruined reading books on the window seat, where the book Tom gave Jules lay in perfect condition. Until he moved over to the bed and began to make it, passing the teddy to Jules, who didn't care to take it, so he just placed it to the side of her.

Tom came to rest next to Jules, she faced away from him, but her body was relaxed and slightly touching his side with her body. "Do you think you can try and have a shower today?"

"Fuck off."

"Jules i'm just trying to help you."

"I don't need help."

"You know all too well that, that isn't true."

"Why do you care so much. Just leave me alone. I don't want your help."

"I care for you because I love you, you can't expect me to just turn a blind eye when you are struggling, I understand at the moment you would rather not look at your body, but you still need to keep up with personal hygiene. Why don't I cover the mirror with a towel so you can't see anything?"

"No... I don't want to have a shower."

"Why not?"

"It will hurt...it will sting. I don't want to see my fat, ugly, injured body."

Tom took a deep breath in finally realising the problem, "Okay well, the stinging will eventually go when you are in there long enough love, I know it will be painful, but I think it will do you some good to freshen up." Jules lifted her head from her knees and slowly placed it on Tom's shoulders, he reacted by placing his arm around her, and gently rubbing her arm. "You will be okay Jules, you can get through this. I know you don't believe it right now, but I will get you through this."

"I didn't mean to get angry at you, i'm just frustrated and hurting. I'm sorry Tom."

"It's alright, why don't I go and turn the shower on for you? I'll go get a female nurse, who has to sit at the opening of the door."