Ephemeral //H.S

Chapter 61

-Lucy Urbinati-

Liam and Zayn left an hour and a half ago, they left me in this bedroom with the laptop. I think I'm going insane, surrounded by clinical white walls. At least it makes me feel like I belong here, since it feels like an asylum already. The door is wide open, but I haven't left the room yet and I'm not sure why, but it scares me to go out this door. They said that I could do whatever I wanted as long as I didn't leave the apartment, and didn't try to contact anyone, and by that they meant Harry.

I've been stuck inside my own head for the last hour and a half, each word written on that file repeating themselves in my head. I read them over a hundred times, not believing a single thing at first. I couldn't believe it, I can't believe it. It feels like something out of a nightmare, the one person I trusted in life and in death is not someone I actually know. My dad hid so many things from me and it keeps on unravelling, everything is falling apart and I'm the one that's left to deal with it.

All my life I believed that we were the picture perfect family, the kind you see in magazines and envy, I realize now how cliché and cheesy that is. But how badly I wish that I was still innocent, clueless and happy. I suddenly start to realize that everytime something bad falls into my lap my first instinct is to feel sorry for myself. I keep on saying that I didn't ask for any of that, but maybe I actually deserve it because I was a bad person in a past life, or I just am a bad person and I deserve every bad thing that happens to me.

In less than five minutes I found out that my dad had a debt towards Russel therefore he also had a debt towards Resilience, an organization I thought was founded by the government but turns out it's all a lie, and Liam, Zayn and I are the only ones aware of it as of today. Russel created the "company" as a pretext to dismantle criminal organizations, that is true except that the founding was denied 25 years ago, which means that the government has nothing to do with Resilience, they might not even be aware that it exists to this day. I have no idea how it's still going on right under the authorities eyes, they have to at least know about it. I saw the employee's list and there are over a hundred people working for Russel, all of them clueless about their bosse's actual intention with this organization. But it's nothing compared to everything else I learned..

My dad initially wanted to work for Russel, years before I was born in order to get rid of Giorgio and of the Urbinati Clan along with it, but when he found out what was really happening he immediately drew back and gave up on wanting to work for him. But for some reason, something that isn't written in the records is the origin of his debt towards Russel. Dad owed him something, I have no idea what it is, but he wasn't able to pay him back before it was too late. Ever since their accident, I've always thought that Giorgio or one of his rivals was responsible, but today I finally got my clear answer. An answer I wish I never got now that I know.

My heart sank when I read what had actually happened.

May 1st

8:13 a.m Violet Urbinati, driving daughter Lucy (Bella) to middle school.

8:55 a.m Roberto Urbinati, driving to law firm, unable to approach the target.

10:34 a.m Roberto alone on office balcony, contact with Russel.

No more sight of the target until 3 p.m, driving to hospital to pick up wife, then to middle school for daughter.

Opportunity at 3:41 p.m

3:42 p.m car driven off bridge.

3:44 p.m car underwater, no sign of survivors.

'no sign of survivor'

It felt like I couldn't breathe anymore, it felt so much more real to see it on paper, to see the facts; that their murder was ordered by Russel.