Ephemeral //H.S

Chapter 21

-Harry Styles-

A rush travels up my body the moment I pull the trigger, the bullet leaving the barrels and going straight through the red dot in the middle of the target. I grin to myself, honestly impressed because it's been two years since I've even touched a gun.

Would she be impressed?

I go to shoot again, but the memory of her lips against mine makes a chill lightly shake my hand, and I miss.

"Focus son." I clench my jaw at the sound of his voice, my teeth almost snapping at the action.

"Stop calling me that, I'm not your fucking son." I mutter before shooting again, once, twice and three other times without missing once.

He scoffs and I place the gun down on the table in front of me and turn around to face him. His strong gray mustache hiding his upper lip, his stern eyes surrounded by wrinkles looking right back into mine. He analyzes me for a few seconds, I know he so badly wants to put me back in my place right now but he's not going to, he doesn't have the right to anymore. Not after what he did to me.

That's how it's been ever since I got back, training everyday and him watching me, waiting for me to show signs of weakness, of fear.Intense weight lifting, cardio and today was aiming, but I obviously still got it. He's been watching me like a hawk, waiting for the itch, for the eye twitch and the gut wrenching pain of withdrawal. It's been weeks now since i've felt a single symptom of withdrawal, thank god because I don't think I could've taken it any longer. And I have her now, she keeps me from wanting to be sedated. She's already under my skin, and she's much stronger than drugs.

To be honest I don't think I'll ever recover from last night, I can't fucking believe she was the one to kiss me first. I know I've wanted to do it for so long now, and she was the one to soothe that ache I didn't know I was suffering from. I don't really know what I was expecting, I know I asked her if I could do it but at first I just needed to be sure, to be sure that I wasn't delusional and that her lips were what I was needing. I fuck, I really needed them.

Soft, warm and pliable against mine. She tastes like raspberry, and now I crave it every second. The way she tangled her fingers into my hair, how she whined against my mouth when I touched her right her ear, I guess I found her sweet spot; and I can't wait to keep on finding new ones. She's so fucking hot and she has no idea, but I know she's still not comfortable with it, she didn't know how to react when the words escaped my lips, I just couldn't help myself but to tell her.

I can't wait to hear her make that noise again, if she'll let me make her feel good. I wonder if she's ever felt it, if she's ever been with someone who made her feel good in every sense of the term. If she's done it herself, if she wants me to make her feel it. Because right now there's nothing else I'd rather do, than to hear her whine against me again.

"Amanda got you new gear, go get ready Zayn's waiting for you." His harsh voice snaps me out of my daydreaming and I nod, clearing my throat as I exit the room.

I need to stay focused, I can't be thinking about her that way when I'm going out for the first time in two years or else I'll never make it through the day.

I walk through the dark hallways, keeping my head up and nodding at the few people I remember. I can feel everyone's stare on me but I don't budge, I don't give a fuck what they think about me. I know what most of them are thinking, 'the golden boy who took on more than he could handle' 'teacher's pet' and all of that shit, but none of them could ever do what I do, they could never be me.

I was the one to bring in more gang members than they ever did, I was the one who almost decimated an entire gang but of course that one night fucked everything up. That asshoe slipped through my fingers, I had him, but he shot first because I was distracted. I know I was distracted by something or someone, but the thing is that I can't fucking remember any of it.