Peace of the Heart (Cacher Series #1)

Kabanata 33

Kabanata 33

Farewell

(TW: Suicidal)

I remember this scene. I remember how I waited for one day to see my parents' body... I remember how many time I blamed myself on what had happened as I waited. I remember how I prayed hard to wake me up if that was a nightmare... I remember it all... I remember it.

But now... why am I experiencing it again? Why Frence? He was a good man. Why so sudden? Why of all of people... him? He doesn't deserve this. He was too young to die.

"Martiza..." Laylay balikat na tawag sa akin ni Kuya Wancho. "Do you want see him?"

Pinikit ko ang aking mga mata habang ang luha ay lumalandas pababa sa aking mukha.

"Mama donated his organs."

Wala akong ibang makita kung hindi ang huling alaala namin. Ang pagpapaalam namin kay Kuya Wancho. Ang akala ko makakasama ko siya sa pasko... ang akala ko... sa kan'ya ko na ulit mararamdaman ang pagmamahal... dalawang taon pa lang kaming magkasama... bakit parang ang bilis naman niyang kunin sa akin?

"Martiza..." Tawag ulit ni Kuya Wancho. "Gusto mo ba siyang makita?"

I nodded my head and he guided me. We entered the morgue and my tears couldn't stop from falling knowing that the body covered in white blanket... belongs to Frence. It is Frence. Kuya Wancho interlocked our fingers to guide me because I couldn't keep a straight posture.

Closer and closer... I can't seem to pull the blanket to see what's beneath of it. I can't accept the fact. I do believe that he is still alive. This is not true.

Hinawi ni Kuya Wancho ang tela at tumambad sa akin ang mapayapang mukha ni Frence. Agad akong yumakap kay Kuya Wancho at humikbi sa kan'yang bisig. Hinagod niya ang aking likod habang nakatingin siya kay Frence. Nang mapansing nanginginig ako ay patuloy niyang hinagod ang aking likod at pinunasan ang aking mga luha.

"Tahan na..." Nahihirapan niyang bulong sa akin.

Hindi ako makapaniwala.

He looked peaceful.

Like he was just sleeping and he would open his eyes the moment he heard my voice.

Ibinaling ko ulit ang aking tingin sa kan'ya. He has many scars, located on his forehead and the side of his lips. I was told that he died from an accident, his motorcycle was crashed to death that I can no longer identify it. It was so fast, things happened out of the hand.

Sinubukan kong hawakan ang kan'yang pisnge gamit ang nanginginig kong kamay. I was hoping that he would move and catch it, then he would tease me to death. But no... I kept on waiting for him to move... but he was just frozen to death.

"Martiza... Wala na talaga siya..."

Napahagulgol sa sinabi ni Kuya Wancho. Hindi dahil sa hindi ko tanggap. Tanggap ko na. Nakita ko na. Pero kahit ano'ng tanggap ko... naroon pa rin 'yung sakit. Na sa kahit alam kong wala na talaga siya... umaasa pa rin ako na baka... sana... buhay siya.

Patuloy kong hinawakan ang kan'yang mukha. Na baka magising siya kapag naramdaman niya ang aking kamay. Na baka sa hawak ko... muli ko siyang makita.

"Martiza," Napatingin ako kay Kuya. "Lumabas na tayo at aasikasuhin na nila ang... bangkay ni Frence..."

Hindi ko pa kayang magpaalam sa kan'ya. Pero hinawakan na ako ni Kuya Wancho para ilabas sa morgue. Umupo kami sa upuan at ang katahimikan ay naghari sa aming dalawa. Ramdam ko ang pabalik-balik na tingin niya sa akin, mukhang tinitignan ang aking kalagayan. Isinandal ko ang aking ulo sa pader at tinakpan ng dalawang kamay ang aking mukha para matigil ang mga luha.