all time low (2012-2013)

starbucks

A/N: in this chapter bryan stars is mentioned, i DO NOT support him, but bear in mind all of these things are taking part in 2013 when we still thought he was a good person, so he shall be included since he was one of the very important people for the emo band interviews.

the next day i wake up and kellin wasnt there, nor was the entire band, my eyes were swollen from the tears and i still had a headache, it was like an aftertaste.

nothing felt real.

i wake up and i stretch as i walk around the van, and i find a sticky note on one of the cabinets reading.

"me and the band left for studio, i'll be down here l8ter tonite - kellin" i squint to read it, and i sigh, i go on my phone to distract myself, i was lucky we arent playing any shows tonight, and i see that alex has called me thrice and i didn't answer.

i go outside the van for better service as i wait for alex to pick up, and he answers after a few rings.

"danielle? goodmorning" alex says.

"goodmorning" i tell him.

"uh how are you, you are staying with sleeping with sirens?" he asks me.

"i'm good, and yeah" i tell alex

"you dont sound okay" alex tells me.

"i'm fine lex, but dont expect me to stay in the same van as you guys" i tell him.

"what? why?" he asks.

"you know..?" i tell alex hoping he gets what i mean without having to spit it out.

"no..?" alex wonders in confusion.

"well i guess i could see you?

"yeah, sure, i'll meet you infront of our bus" alex says and i hang up and i fix my hair quickly, and i walk to our bus, where alex is waiting, i was still in my anthem hoodie and kellin's pants, and i meet alex who is fully dressed like he is ready to go somewhere.

"hey" he says as he locks his phone, putting it back in his pocket.

"hey" i tell him as i cross my hands.

"uh wanna go somewhere? im sure theres a starbucks nearby" he tells me.

"yep why not" i say as i sigh.

"okay i'll ring up a staff member to drive us" alex says, he walks away from me as he makes the call.

"lessgo, trevor is driving us" he announces.

"bet" we walk to the garage area and we hop in the car's backseat.

"where to?" trevor asks us while looking in the front view mirror.

"nearest starbucks" alex says, trevor drives us, it was windy and gloomy today and it just made it worse for me, we make it to the starbucks and i get myself a cheesecake, weird right? i was hungry and i havent had anything since last night's meal that i threw up.

alex comes back with his coffee and we sit in the back on a small two seat table, and his phone buzzes on the table.

"oh sorry i gotta take this" he picks up the phone.

"hey baby..oh i'm doing great yep uhh me and danielle went to get coffee..mhm..yeah we are off today, we dont have shows for three days...tell me are you doing ok? i'll try getting a ticket to fly back to you as soon as i can..okay i love you so much bye" he hangs up and apologizes for making me wait.

and all i could think about is how much i envied sabrina for having such a great boyfriend like alex, alex was a great son, friend, and lover, everyone around him loved him, i just felt jealous that jack never loved me the way alex loved sabrina, not that i think he ever tried making it work out.

"oh its fine its nothing" i tell him as i bite into the berry cheesecake i got.

"so..how are you feeling?" alex asks me as he sips on his coffee.

"shitty" i tell him.

"i'm sorry" is all he manages to say as he frowns.

"last night i got sick for some reason and i threw up in the toilet, jack couldn't even bother to answer our calls, i found him in our bus with the same girl from backstage on top of him, red lipstick all over his neck, i felt sick" i tell him and i start getting nauseous all over again from it's memory.

"wait what? jack didnt tell me that?" alex says as he starts getting angry.

"yeah he obviously wouldnt dumbass, he wouldnt be like 'oh i cheated on your friend last night and she walked on it happening and i didnt even try to make it right' " i quote to alex.

"i'm sorry, i thought you were just with kellin but i didnt know this entire deal happened, my god" he says, and i feel him being pitiful for me.

i'd pity me too.

"well, what now?" he asks me as he puts down his coffee, and it started raining, it was dripping all over the cafe's glass windows.

"i'm not staying on this damn bus and i'm not going back to him, atleast not until i think he misses me yet, i made it too easy for him mistake after another" i say, im so stupid for all of that forgiveness, he never deserved it.

"im sorry dont panic's tour will be stressful for you, we have to manage it" alex says.

"yeah will do" i say, honestly, what i'm i supposed to do.

"well, shouldn't i tell people?" i ask alex.

"i guess? you dont want bryan stars up our asses" alex says as he sighs while crumbling the tissue he just used.

"okay then, i'll do it when i'm back to the van" i tell alex, eventually we leave starbucks and i run to sleeping with siren's van so i dodge jack, or any of my other band members.

"hello?? kellin??" i yell as i drop my wallet on the nearest counter.

"justinnn??" i yell and nobody answers so i figured they are still away.

i turn on one of the lamps for better lightning and i prop my phone on a tissue box, and hit recording, i wanted to talk with our fans about the jack situation and that we are separating.

"hey everyone, just wanted to peep in and say hi, thanks to everyone who has been coming down to our dont panic tour, it's been fun meeting and talking with everyone, but i wanted to say something, that me and jack are No longer together and i hope everyone respects that, it does not make any difference for our band and it wont change our love for music, love you guys" i hit the button again to save the video, i take a deep breath and i post it.

i stash my phone away as i wander around the bus, wondering what i could do until they are back, i dig in their shelfs and i find a box of mac and cheese, i make me one and i turn on the tv they had, i was watching some movie that was on, honestly all i wanted was entertainment.