Meant to be

The Question - Mason

Everybody deals with loss differently.

Every family deals with loss differently, especially when the death is sudden and abrupt leaving a permanent hole in the family.

We lost Nonno four months ago, from the moment Don walked in and declared he was gone, the family changed. I met him when I was seven and he never treated me any different to his own flesh and blood. He'd never fail to take time out of his day to speak to me, give me advice and encourage me. His last piece of advice he'd given me the day he died is something I hold close to my heart.

It's something that I can't bring myself to share with anyone yet.

Even with Evie who I share most things with.

Especially Evie.

Given that she was the topic of our conversation.

I sigh deeply thinking about it all, knowing this will just lead to me feeling emotional.

Walking into the dragon's den emotional isn't wise.

Nonno always gave me words to think about and the words that seem to linger with everyone is how important family is. It had me thinking that maybe I should reach out to my own biological family. We're older now and whatever the issue seemed to be when I younger, surely we can just put it behind us and just be grown ups now. It's not like I need looking after anymore, I'm twenty three, a graduate even doing my postgrad, I have a daughter of my own to look after. Since they cut me out of the family interview years ago without any regard to how that made me feel, I haven't really spoken to them.

They don't even know about Callie.

So here I am in my car with Callie beside me in her car seat, sleeping peacefully, waiting to be let into the gates. I'm guessing the gates intercom system is a new addition, they certainly didn't have them the last time I was here. Wonder who they're trying to keep out. I think it shocked them just as much as it shocked me when we made these plans last week, but they'd agreed. Maybe they'll finally let me in and be a part of the family, someone who doesn't need to be photoshopped into family photographs. It's so weird that my heart feels like it's pounding out of my chest to see my own flesh and blood. Reaching over to hold Callie's tiny hand, I feel a little more calm, somehow she just has that effect on me.

"Mr Clarke?" The intercom speaks out and I don't recognise the voice, but why would I?

"Yeah Mason Clarke, their son, I told them I was coming"

"Hm" is all he says, he doesn't open the gate for me so I put the car in neutral, hoping I'm not going to be made to wait for too long. Checking my phone to pass the time I open up a Snapchat video from Evie, using the dog filter I hear her sultry voice tell me she hopes seeing my family again won't be ruff before she breaks out into a wide smile. Sending one back with the big mouth filter I blow her a kiss, and showcase the still snoozing Callie. Next I see a text from Jodie, asking whether I'm still coming over. I figured I should kill two birds with one stone, reconcile with my family and try to forge a better relationship with the mother of my baby. I know I'll probably rethink my decision on the latter, but I don't want Callie knowing that I don't like her mum. Even if I don't, maybe Jodie will surprise me, I'm not holding my breath but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. Confirming I'm coming when the sound of the intercom startles me.

"It seems like they got their dates confused or something. The Clarke's aren't here" he says in a tone that tells me he's not apologetic.

"When will they be back?"

"After New Years, they're not in the country"

"Okay, thanks"

For nothing.