Entwined (A Bucky Barnes story - 18+)

Chapter 24

[Laurel's POV]

It'd been a few days since I'd found out about my parents and since I'd seen him.

I couldn't bring myself to go to the Avengers compound, I couldn't face looking at him yet.

I wanted to hate him, with every fibre of my body, but the fact I also had these feelings pierced by undeniable love made me feel that much worse.

Nat had stayed with me the first couple of nights, not wanting to leave me alone after how much I was drinking. Eventually she gave up trying to stop me, but her persistent tea-making had slowly weaned me off all the alcohol in the apartment.

Nat never once forced me to talk about it, letting me process it in my own way. It was what I always liked about her.

After the constant intoxication of about three days straight, I had a pretty rough come down.

Nat had switched with Wanda at that point, and unfortunately she got the rough end of the stick.

The hangover that came afterwards was straight from Hell itself.

On the first day of Wanda stepping in, she spent most of it holding my hair back as I was sick multiple times, my body trying to eradicate itself of every toxin. But unfortunately it did nothing to get rid of my memories and feelings.

I felt so conflicted. Bucky was the first person I'd ever loved and felt safe with. The first person I'd ever opened up to, let myself be vulnerable with.

I was a fool to think it would last as long as it did. Nothing good ever did. All I attracted was suffering.

I knew deep within my bones that Bucky wasn't in his right mind at that point in his life, he literally was brainwashed. But from now on every time I thought of the violent end my parents met, I was met with his cold blue eyes alongside it. I couldn't break that connection, no matter how hard I tried to drown it out.

Wanda made me a herbal tea and brought me some toast, opening the window after she'd put it down on the bedside table.

The autumnal air was a little crisper now in the City, and I was secretly glad of the breeze to cool my sweating body. Wanda sat down on the side of the bed, gesturing to the plate.

"Eat, please Laurel." She said firmly but gently.

I hated feeling helpless, like I was being babysat.

I knew it was because they cared, but it wasn't in my nature to curl up and let those around me take over. I realised that the last few months of trauma and change had finally caught up with me.

I sat up, nibbling on the corners of the toast as she watched me. I could tell she wanted to say something, but just wasn't sure what.

No doubt she could sense how I was feeling if she was rummaging around in my mind, although I was never certain that she was anymore.